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Thread: That Burning Thing (R)

  1. #11
    NS Full Member Czech Angel's Avatar
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    That was um...interesting. My first reaction was 'what the fuck is this?'
    But after I read it again it was kinda good. I also think that Lex was OOC, but I understand that once u get a plot in your head you have to write it down or it keeps nagging you.
    So in other words, your writing style was cool. The fic is just not my thing even though it's good.
    A freaky scary good, but still good.

  2. #12
    storie girl Senior Member starmoon's Avatar
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    Re: That Burning Thing (R)

    that was great but so wrong and sad. lex is so horrible in this story and i wish i could hurt him and save chloe. i wish i could protect her and let her know i would always be her friend.

  3. #13
    Mrs Dean Winchester Senior Member pipersmum's Avatar
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    Red face Re: That Burning Thing (R)

    Very, very intense

    It was written really well even if Chloe and Lex were OOC
    Lex has controlled her for so long now that has been taken away from him!

  4. #14
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    Re: That Burning Thing (R)

    Very well-written. I liked the perspective, the Lex POV. Personally I don't find Lex out of character at all, given what we know of the highly unstable, half-insane misanthrope he's supposed to become in the future. The self-sacrificing, self-condemning woobie half of him notwithstanding, Lex Luthor is a man immanently capable of great violence and destruction, and it's not hard to imagine his control and rage issues, obsessive personality, and extreme possessiveness (which a Luthor would have no problem mistaking for love) spiralling into physical and emotional abuse. Also, the fact that you have Chloe dying of cancer, of all things, actually makes this disturbed, destructive relationship seem inevitable, almost predestined, a continuation of what I like to call the Luthor Curse (each man kills the thing he loves, etc). After all, the same thing more or less happened to Lionel too, after a fashion. So nope, I have no trouble whatever visualisng the version of psychotic!Lex you've got here.

    I don't see Chloe's behaviour as absurd either. Her actions and words are in tune with those of a woman who has been completely broken and defeated by the horrifying transformation of the man she loves; the exhausted, fatalistic bitterness and resentment rings true psychologically as well. It's definitely a bit of a shock, seeing the characters so far gone from their 'Smallville' personas, but even without a more extensively developed backstory, the possibility you've presented here is by no means an unbelievable one, and I'd say that this story is more of a daringly acute exploration of a very warped psyche than an OOC piece of work.

    I thought the cameo appearance of Lionel was an especially nice touch. I can't quite put my finger on why that is; probably a combination of the outside perspective, making the reader wonder exactly how much guilt and sorrow and disgust Lionel is actually feeling, the whole the-son-shall-surpass-the-father thing, and the shadow of all the lingering childhood trauma that doubtless played no small part in driving Lex to his current state.
    When the hospital took her body, my dad was there. He looked ashamed and disgusted, but he did not breathe a word to anyone. Ha, I thought, I’m not like you dad, I don’t let my loves die, I keep them forever.
    Delicious irony too. Though I think it may be because I'm a sucker for Robert Browning-type sickos.

    All in all, I found it an intriguing and compelling story. Sorry it took me two years to read and review it! =P

  5. #15
    storie girl Senior Member starmoon's Avatar
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    Re: That Burning Thing (R)

    very intense story. i cryied a little while reading it. things like this happen to so many women and they are to scared to leve the ones hurting them. i whish chloe would just leave even if she is dieing she should be happy and away from lex since his is now truly evil and just can't stop hurting her and blaming it on chloe which is a lie and so stupid. when chloe dies lex will feel so much pain and be truly alone and in this story he deserves all the pain in the world and chloe deserves to be at peace even if she has to die to get it. if any women is going through what chloe when through in this story i hope they will get help and have the person put in jail so they can't hurt them or anyone else ever again. well written story though it makes me sad and very angery. what goes around cones around so lex will get his one day while chloe is happy and at peace like she deserves.

  6. #16
    NS Senior Member Senior Member Ami Rose's Avatar
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    Re: That Burning Thing (R)

    Quote Originally Posted by Lel View Post
    Very Intense....

    Well Written. I do think it is a good fic. Just possibly Slightly Disturbing (which I guess means you really did write it well considering what it was about)
    Extremely dark! But I agree well written!
    *Coffee Break 9:00 to 5:00 Daily.
    *Heaven doesn't want me and hell is afraid I'll take over.
    *Are you crazy?
    *From zero to insane in 1.5 seconds!
    *If I agree with you, then we'd both be wrong!

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