The Lesser of Two Evils - NC-17, Chapter 56 (May 27, 2016)

[Cassandra Jean]

Thanks for the new chapter.

My heart is breaking for both Chloe and Lex. Hopefully they will be able to heal with one anothers' help.

[somethingeasy]

Chapter Forty-four

He had dressed and spoken like his father since puberty, as a very conscious effort. He had learned to match Lionel drink for drink by the age of fifteen. When he'd turned eighteen, whoring his way through Metropolis had been his birthday wish. He had accomplished it and not slowed down, compounding his empty sex with drugs and alcohol. Lex hardly remembered the last woman he'd had who hadn't been getting paid for her indulgence. He had embraced corruption as another facet of ambition; a comfortable rut of flawed behaviour he was happy to excuse in himself.

He was never going to be virtuous. Teetotaling and drug PSAs were as foreign to Lex as doing his own housework. In a situation where real skills were needed, he wouldn't know what to do with himself. His grasp of strategy had been a life-long talent, but even that had faltered against his father's plans for Chloe.

It looks like Lex is going to be loathing himself, pretty much forever, unless Chloe helps him out. He honestly NEEDS her forgiveness and absolution if he’s ever going to forgive himself. His self-loathing has reached obsessive proportions… which is completely NOT a surprise considering how irrationally obsessive this poor man generally IS.

I find it fascinating seeing all the ‘common traits’ that Lex sees between himself and Lionel. No matter that the two of them look nothing alike, and how they’ve been adversaries most of their lives… Lex still can’t help from painting himself as a ditto copy of his father. Irrationality levels of obsessiveness, I tell you!!!

Worst of all is seeing how Lex completely blames himself for any and all similarities that he perceives between father and son. He sees himself as cultivating all of these deplorable, horrible qualities… as if a young man really has any choice but to want his father’s affections, admiration and respect. It’s only, tragically, natural that Lex would emulate his father, as a desperate means to get his affections and attentions.

It was best to distance himself from Morgan Edge and his rackets anyway. It was too easy to lace club drugs with poison. If any one of Edge's prostitutes was still willing to see him, Lex was certain she would have to be up to something for her boss. That world was a small one, and unconcerned with fair dealings. He was about to step up to lead a company, and his social life would multiply with staid parties where deals were hammered out over champagne. People would be watching. Edge would be watching, and take advantage of weaknesses, so those weaknesses had to be culled.

How could I let another call girl in without thinking of Chloe? I have to live better or I'll be seeing her in every woman, Lex told himself.

It is a huge relief and pleasure to find out that Lex has not only quit drinking excessively, but he’s ALSO resolves to stay as far away from the dubiously legal side of business practices from now on. At least he won’t be falling into the trap of adopting quick, easy illegal and unethical business strategies… at least, never without remembering this one hard lessons that he learned from Lionel and Morgan.

Heh… it’s completely NOT a surprise to find that Lex has also lost his taste for call-girls. Actually, I believe Lex lost his taste for prostitutes a LONG time back… that very night that he brutally and unknowingly took Chloe’s virginity. He’s probably never going to view even something like Pretty Woman the same way again. And I suspect that he’s probably also going to be looking in contempt at any and all business cronies that use prostitutes on a regular basis. Everyone knows that there’s no one more zealous than a true convert after all. And Lex has been completely and irrevocably converted to the ‘Prostitution is abusive and exploitative’ side of the road.

Chloe only slept for a few hours after the surgery. Lex spent the time trying to force his muscles not to bunch and cramp in the seat he refused to leave. Lois had claimed the other chair at her cousin's bedside, her eyes flicking distrustfully at him as she gave every nonverbal cue invented to make him obviously unwelcome.

"I'm sure you have stuff to do," she said, faking a smile. "I'm here now, and I can take care of her."

Lex was too tired to be civil. He shook his head and stared at Chloe's hand curled on the scratchy hospital blanket. "My father is dead and deserves none of my time. My brother is trying to flirt with an ob-gyn to get a recreational oxycontin prescription, and my company would require my giving a shit to benefit from my efforts. Today, I am here for Chloe."

LOL! Oh, can you imagine how incredibly awkward Christmas and other such holiday family get-togethers are going to be once Chloe and Lex officially become a couple? Granted, Lex and Lois are BOUND to become more genuinely civil towards one another, given enough time. But I get the feeling there’s ALWAYS going to be this tension between the two of them. Let’s hope they always manage a civil smile for one another, at least while in Chloe’s presence, lol!

That being said, I do appreciate how they ARE making an effort to be… if not polite, then at least not vicious towards one another, while in Chloe’s hospital room. It’s more than clear that they do NOT enjoy each other’s company, but at least they’re not getting into a wrestling match trying to throw one another out of the room, lol!

Lois kept talking, lapsing effortlessly into memories of funny shared events. They were closer than Lex was to his own father and brother. It was like looking at a family on a cheesy television show; foreign and plausible in a way he could feel but never have. He stood up awkwardly and pushed the chair out of the way in the tiny recovery room.

awwww. I haven’t mentioned it, but I really am VERY glad that Lois is there with Chloe. While I do acknowledge that Lois’s presence is driving a wedge between Lex and Chloe, I also acknowledge that the explicit love, care, affection that Lois bears for Chloe should help to a considerable degree. Chloe needs unconditional emotional support, as well as an easy reach to a very close, trusted confidante. Lois fits that bill perfectly.

BUT… that being said… I can imagine Lois becoming quite suffocating in her care and concern for Chloe. Let’s see whether it becomes too much, eh? Lol!

"That," she paused to take a long swallow of coffee, " - is a different matter. Pregnant women usually try to avoid x-rays, and we don't do emergency medicine here. I have a friend who will treat an anonymous patient for me at the hospital. I'd have to make a call, but I'm pretty sure after icing the arm that it is at least fractured."

Lex put down his cup and leaned on the desk. "Chloe is a reporter. She needs function in her hands. What will it cost to get your friend today?"

"I don't think you recognize the risk in that," Lex sighed. "The recent attack on Chloe is the least of what these men have done. They will kill me, in spite of my security. With me dead, any deal is forfeit. There have been decades long investigations that haven't resulted in jail time. They just killed one of the richest and most influential men in the city, and the only thing they're worried about is what Chloe knows. If you can't provide the confidentiality you promised, please connect me with someone who can."

The woman looked sad, and shut her eyes for a long moment. "I'll need a series of cheques to cover the hospital charges. My friend will fill them out with what looks like monthly payments and file them over a reasonable span of time. And then we'll have to see what we can do for Chloe without getting her into trouble."

Wow! I knew that Lex would be working hard to make sure that Chloe received all the care and protection that was needed. But I didn’t realize just how quickly and yet also carefully Lex was going to have to start managing all this care and protection. He’s just BARELY had time to get over his shock… he’s still in the midst of guiltily grieving AND celebrating his father’s death… while also dealing with an intense bout of self-loathing and self-hate… and yet he’s STILL managing to juggle Chloe’s care, while maintaining a protective secrecy about her injuries and identity.

I am seriously impressed… not to mention awe-struck at the intensity of the attention to detail that Lex is maintain to make sure that Chloe gets FULL recovery, and gets back to whatever she can salvage of ‘normalcy’. His comment about Chloe regaining full functionality of her hands, because ‘as a reporter, needs them them’, just made me swoon with delight!

Heh… and I also loved how, the whole time Lex was arranging for Chloe’s care, I could easily imagine the doctor just looking at him with a judgmental, censuring expression on her face. Her whole body practically screaming contempt and disdain towards this poor man. And poor Lex probably just TOOK that silent judgment, as his due punishment. Oh, Lex!

I don’t blame the doctor for her attitude. She doesn’t know the whole story… doesn’t get the whole picture. It’s only natural that she would cast Lex as a controlling, villainous manipulator over here. It’s just a darned shame that her inaccurate judgment will be further intensifying Lex’s own feelings of self-hate.


Chapter Forty-five

He had a whole book of blank cheques, drawn on a shell company where the employees did not even know Lex Luthor was their major shareholder. He had hurriedly gulped down a coffee and some toast his driver insisted on making. There were arrangements to be made for Lionel, and the police seemed eager to speak to him about the circumstances of death. He had no time for it. Lionel Luther had done everybody a favour dying, and doing so in a hospital meant there was no need to identify the body. Lex would not have rushed in to do so even if it meant his father ended up in potter's field in an anonymous grave.

He would leave Chloe to make sure she was protected and getting the help she needed, but it was not for Lionel to claim one more second of his time.

Ouch! I know that Lex has excellent, reasonable and justifiable cause in celebrating his father’s death… BUT I feel really uncomfortable for him. It just isn’t healthy for Lex to completely shut off any and all feelings, and feel absolutely and completely disinterested in Lionel’s passing.

Lex didn’t have much of a father, but Lionel WAS his father… and a part of Lex always held onto to the HOPE that Lionel would, somehow, one day, become a loving, close father to him. Lex hasn’t lost a father, so much as any HOPE of having a father. But even the loss of that impossible hope would hurt. Burying that grieving under a veneer of defiant self-satisfaction at the bastard’s death isn’t going to make that grief go away.

Lex was fairly certain this cloud of hatred for everything his father was wouldn't extend to running the company. He knew a fair number of employees, and respected their rights to be led by someone who wanted the corporation to succeed. His frustration was temporary, he thought hopefully, and ambition would take over once he'd had time to adjust.

It was a huge relief to find out that Lex’s sense of Luthor-loathing wasn’t going to extend to taking over Lionel’s company. Lex might hate himself AND his father, but at least he doesn’t extend that hating resentment over to LuthorCorp too.

Perhaps burying himself in the satisfaction of succeeding at work will provide him with SOME amount of solace, triumph, victory and fulfillment. All the emotional fulfillment that he was robbed of upon rescuing Chloe might be gotten through success in other things…?

OR, perhaps we should just hold our hopeful breathes, waiting for Chloe to grant her absolution, before Lex can finally feel some measure of peace and fulfillment…?

This wouldn't kill him, but Lex felt hobbled. Feeling better seemed like a longer journey than he had the will to travel. He wouldn't give up on Chloe, but he had to put his limited energy toward getting her well.

He squinted into the skyline and wondered whether letting himself think of futures - his own, Chloe's, or some entangled joint prospect - was a mistake.

*wistful sigh* oh, Lex! It was the BOTH of you that survived this horrendous situation together. Stop trying to deprive yourself of sharing in Chloe’s moment of freedom.

*sigh* Lex can’t help it. He can’t help but think himself as part of the problem in Chloe’s life, rather than a huge part of the solution. Oh, LEX!!!

Nodding, the blonde looked around for a place to put the juice. She had a whole array of snacks crowded on her knees, and a stack of magazines was thumped down on one foot.

"Sorry," Lois yelped. She made a face and Chloe shrugged.

"I didn't feel it, really."

"You can still feel your legs though, right," her cousin frowned.

ROTFLMAO! I can just imagine that Chloe probably doesn’t know whether to laugh, cry or scream at Lois’s over-whelming sense of Care and Concern for her little cousin. Just imagine… Lois yelping in panic because she thought that a stack of magazines on Chloe’s leg might have hurt! A. Stack. Of. Magazines!!!! Good grief, it wasn’t even a stack of proper books!!!! Lol!

I can easily imagine Chloe feeling, not only exasperated, but also rather embarrassed and humiliated at being treated as a Victim, with a purposely capital ‘V’. Chloe probably feels like an idiotic, helpless damsel, viewing herself through Lois’s overly-solicitous behavior.

I know that Lois is doing her best to be helpful and supportive, and is probably trying her best to navigate a very touchy, sensitive and difficult emotional mine-field… and I appreciate how the woman is doing a truly wonderful job in making Chloe feel a little less alone. BUT, I can also easily see how Chloe would probably want at least some time away from Lois.

The chipper voice and can-do attitude only made Chloe's oppressed feelings heavier. She didn't want to do anything, even if it put her body back together. She last remembered wanting something just before she'd locked herself in Lex's shower. Hot water had momentarily pulled her away from the deep awareness of her body's damage. There had been harsh satisfaction in scrubbing Lionel's signs away.

She would not have his baby. There was equal relief in knowing the rather inadequate precautions with Lex had worked, too. She was barely able to get a straw to her mouth. She wasn't fit to be anybody's spy, and obviously unsuited to be a whore. Her emotional reserves were too empty to be a mother, even one who gave her child away. She had prayed so long to be simply useless.

No one would want her now, and Chloe let a tiny, bitter chuckle out from dry lips.

Oh, Chloe! Oh the poor girl! Oh, NO!!! While it was delightful hearing about the ‘harsh satisfaction’ that Chloe gained from knowing that she was free from Lionel’s touch and reach forever… it’s also a damned shame to find out that she still can’t get away from his influence… not completely.

Nonky, I really appreciate how you didn’t make Chloe feel the clichéd sense of ‘tainted filthiness’ in the aftermath of her trauma. I do realize that there’s a reason why this is a cliché… because this feeling IS based on truth. But I really liked how Nonky introduced a really interesting, original sense of PTSD haunting in Chloe… a feeling of hollowness, rather than a feeling of filthiness. As if Chloe has been scooped out of everything that was clear, clean, valued and worthwhile… and has been left as a shell of her former self… with a ‘life’ that’s ALSO a shell of it’s former self as well.

Brilliant writing, Nonky!!!
Really unnerving, traumatic, tragic and haunting! I loved it!

He didn't want to have her lie, but truth would be dangerous. The investigation of his father had been building steam, and it would be difficult to discourage Assistant Director Curry after rallying the agent to find the manpower.

Once again, I love seeing all these details about how Lex is just deftly managing all of Chloe’s outside troubles, while she’s trying to heal herself from within. I love how he’s handling all of this without troubling her in the slightest about what he’s up to, and all the trouble that he’s taking to make the whole scandal all ‘go away’.

I also realize that Lex is keeping secrets from Chloe about how he’s managing to clean up what is essentially THEIR shared mess… but I don’t see it as being controlling, secretive or manipulative. Is see it as being kind, discreet, generous with his time and carefully considerate about keeping Chloe from troubling information while she’s still recovering from PTSD.

But… I do wonder… who is helping Lex through HIS PTSD?!?? Is he even eating or sleeping properly? Who is making sure that he’s taking care of HIMSELF too. Chloe has Lois acting as a caregiver and watchguard... so what does poor Lex have?!??

He couldn't buy Chloe. He couldn't charm her. He couldn't even see her. As he handed over the cheques, the billionaire said, "I'm glad she's doing well. Please let her know I'm thinking of her."

The man left and Lex sighed deeply. He'd been thinking of Chloe nonstop for weeks, and if he wanted his sanity he had to stop. Out of respect for her, he had to conclude she wanted to be off his mind just as badly as he needed the space back for his own aching psyche.

Oh, Lex! I can see how this kind of attitude is only going to lead to misunderstanding and yet more unnecessary distance between Chloe and Lex. Lex is going to keep his physical and emotional distance from Chloe, thinking that she wouldn’t want a reminder of his father around herself. And Chloe is going to assume that Lex is keeping his distance because he doesn’t want Lionel’s ‘used up leftovers’. Especially not since the leftovers have been picked clean of all worthwhile bits.

Oh, the two!!! Heh… just when I thought everything was resolved after Lionel’s death… it turns out that there’s STILL some grief, trauma and helpless fear to be dealt with. I can’t wait to see how it’s all resolved in the end.

Please update soon, Nonky!!!!

[trckyrcky]

This is great! I did not expect an update so soon but I am not complaining. I can clearly see that less is nothing like his father. He really cares for Chloe and what happen to the people at Luthorcorp. I know the title is The Lesser of Two Evils but from what I had read so far, I don't think Lex is remotely evil at all.

[cbrunberg]

so glad you updated it.i hope chloe and lex can both help each other to heal.lex is doing everything he can to help chloe

[kitten]

Chapter Forty-Six

Lex was too drawn to resist all the demands that had been pushed back until Chloe's medical needs were met. He knew those who answered to him thought his lot was easier, but it required strength to say 'no' to endless requests. 'Yes' was so much easier, especially when things felt hopeless. 'Yes' got approval and acceptance and he desperately needed both.

He went back to the penthouse in a daze, his hands tingling with the stupid urge to do something useful for Chloe. He knew calling would not be welcome. Money would be an insult. His presence endangered her privacy.

There was nothing, not to do or say or think. There was an empty seat with his name on it, but he was not actually there, even when Tino carefully delivered him to each meeting. He was a living effigy of himself.

People thought he was grieving; apologizing for their timing as they dragged words out of him that Lex wasn't sure were truths. They needed him to throw his weight around so they could adjust to his running of the company. His disinterest made meaningful decisions impossible.

He took phone calls from nervous executives, assuring them they were not automatically fired just because they'd been hired by his father. Neither would there be a clearing house of all of his father's cronies, unless they resisted Lex's leadership. He spoke to lawyers, and accountants. He made an excruciatingly long call to the large funeral home that handled arrangements for Kansas governors and cardinals. He filed for permits to close the street in front of LuthorCorp.

They'll want a parade, he thought incredulously. They want an event of the scope of a dead pharoah, with the publicity of a new flavour of soda.

It astonished him to see the changes in the city. Any resentment of the money and power his father had wielded so sadistically was shrugged off. Newspapers, including the one Chloe worked for, printed editorials memorializing Lionel Luthor's contributions to society. The business pundits made predictions for the future of the company. Stocks wavered, but people were waiting for the first mass sell-out from a shareholder. They were watching Lex for any sign of weakness or disrespect. Unlike a private citizen, Lex could not do what he needed to get through. There was a proper way to grieve a man like his father, and he would be criticized for doing otherwise.

Even in death, Lionel could make things happen. He was getting a solitary tomb on a rise in the cemetery that held the famous and elite on million dollar real estate. Everyone was creating the myth of a late paragon, a pillar of the community. Praising him now that he couldn't do any harm was easier than acknowledging his flaws.

In the days before the funeral, Lex was soothed by few things. Lucas had somehow endeared himself to Lois Lane, so there were a few updates about Chloe's condition. She was at home with her father, resting. The plot to cover up her ordeal had fooled Gabe Sullivan, which in turn was saving his life. The plant manager wasn't the type of man to let his daughter's abusers go unpunished. Chloe was all he had aside from a few modest assets, and he would take care of her until she was feeling up to looking out for herself.

But the trick to getting to the end of the day without becoming a slurring heap was not to think about Chloe and her loved ones, he'd realized.

Instead of drinking excessively, Lex poured one double and took in the city. He looked out and tried to think about all the people behind lighted and darkened windows. Most of them had never met a Luthor personally. Most of them had never fallen under Lionel's plotting. Most of them were innocent of the evil that had died a few days ago, now absurdly mourned by everybody except his two sons, two young women and a deeply conflicted doctor.

It only felt like Lionel had handled and fucked over everyone Lex knew. In reality, he was being replaced in people's minds. After the funeral, if the pomp and circumstance satisfied what they were expecting, it would seem almost boring to obsess over a single person now gone.

Lex wanted to live to an advanced age, if only to see the day when people struggled to remember his father's first name. He wanted the future to sweep his father away like yesterday's sidewalk trash, unremarked and nearly unseen. He wanted to be in that world now, beyond the burden of acting like he was somehow moved by his father's death.

He had made the trade, and it was worth living with the memory. Chloe had lived. Lex had lived. Lionel had preached ruthlessness since Lex's childhood, like calling down the prophesy of his own death. It might even have given the old man some satisfaction.

Lex poured out his drink untouched, and hoped very strongly his father had never been genuinely proud of him.


Lois had made up an excuse to visit on the weekend, despite Chloe's protests. They didn't get together in Smallville often because Lois didn't like the little town. Lex had told them to keep to their usual activities, and the cousins often went whole months without a visit. The visit wasn't typical, and it would make keeping quiet harder than being by herself.

She keeps talking about it, the reporter thought angrily. Why doesn't she understand I don't want to say anything about the worst thing that's ever happened to me?

Chloe's sprained ankle had been better by the second day, though her whole body was creaky from lying around. Her fractured arm was dead weight, and she couldn't type. Her face bruised up in a rainbow of hues, but nothing was really damaged. Internally, her stomach ached where she'd been punched and the stitches stung when she peed. There was no question now that she would recover physically. She had not believed it at first.

Her father had been too horrified she was hurt to ask a lot of questions. It was simple for him to think a traffic accident was the cause, and his guilt was bad enough knowing he couldn't have changed the event by being there. He was kind and sweet, but ultimately took what she said at face value. She found herself resenting his calm assumption that she would be 'back at it soon enough.' If he had been more intent on discipline, she would have been safely at home instead of meeting with Lionel. If he had just noticed her exhaustion he might have started supervising her in time to make a difference.

Rationally, Chloe understood her father had done his best. Her teachers, her editor at The Daily Planet, even total strangers worked hard to protect her in many different ways. She was lucky to be alive and have anything of her old life remain.

She was just . . . there wasn't enough time in the rest of her life to express how angry she was. She hated herself for not finding a way to escape. She hated her father for letting her be a precocious reporter without backup or protection. She hated Lex for ever, ever touching her; even when she'd insisted, even when she'd liked it. She hated Lois for knowing what she'd been through. She hated Clark for existing and Morgan Edge for sneering at her while she struggled not to cry.

If she could damn someone by willing it, Lionel was burning. Chloe knew feeling negative about everything wasn't helping her, but she couldn't shut down the steady drone of her rage. As her body felt better, her mind swirled with revenge. She needed to punish someone. Her misery needed company.

In other moments, she lay like a pile of rags across her bed, propped and coddled into helplessness. She didn't know herself in the quiet, injured young woman who dabbed lotion on healing bruises and ignored everything in the paper except an elaborate funeral.

Lois spent most of her visit up in Chloe's bedroom, both young women pretending to watch movies with purposefully light plots. Instead of bunking on her cousin's floor, Lo took the guest bedroom. She added her eerie silence to Chloe's own, and the two of them made wary conversation about inconsequential things. Lois had always been the tough and worldly one, and even she was shocked by the Luthors.

Lionel had ruined everything. He had ruined her. Chloe was glad when Lois drove back to the city, and relieved when her father stopped hanging around to wait on her. She needed a long time to accept that she had made it home to her father.

She needed to be able to sleep without waking up whimpering and gagging on scotch.

[Cassandra Jean]

Poor Lex and Chloe; they are so miserable. Hopefully they will stop distancing themselves from one another so that they can help each other deal with everything that went on.

[Rachet]

I hope Chloe doesn't take out her anger on Lex.

[talon]

oh wow. so i remember reading the first chapter of this story and now this last one. I am guessing that lionel raped chloe. i feel so awful- but i think chloe's feelings were depicted well in this chapter! I'll have to catch up on the middle stuff.

[somethingeasy]

Chapter Forty-Six

I really loved the run-down, dazed, shell-shocked and completely exhausted description of Lex in the first section. I’m beginning to wonder whether the poor man is getting ANY amount of sleep at all, or whether he’s been living purely on ten minutes worth of stolen cat-naps per 24 hour days.

The description of Lex being weary completely to the ends of his limits left ME feeling stressed and exhausted… and I’m on vacation!!! I liked how Lex felt so vacant and empty… just going through the motions on the routines of being ‘Lex Luthor’, without really feeling connected or emotionally bound to any of his decisions of actions.

I especially loved how the ONLY thing that really measured with any kind of realism or emotional resonance in Lex’s weary haze, were thoughts of Chloe. It was only all of his worries, anxieties, depression and obsession about her that really jerked him into any semi state of awakening. Brilliantly written, Nonky.

Heh… and I loved the irony on how, after his death, people were beginning to venerate Lionel Luthor… dedicated reverential columns in the newspapers, speaking about his accomplishments on the streets and televisions news channels… and even giving his poor ‘grieving’ son a little bit of respectful room to maneuver while he’s adjusting to his new lot in life. It’s so ironically funny, that I can’t even find it in myself to be mad about it. It’s just so ludicrously ridiculous, that it’s more funny than maddening.

And I also loved how Lex is, more and more, distancing himself from everything that his father was, and everything that his father wanted him to be. Starting with Lex’s own determination to NOT become a thug like dear dad… to small things, like choosing NOT to use alcohol for any numbing, sedating purposes.

And as for Chloe… the poor girl is in a desperate state, but going through a different kind of numbed suffering than Lex. While Lex has some routine actions and behavior to use to numb himself… Chloe doesn’t have that kind of luxury. The poor girl is trapped in a hospital bed, with nothing but time on her hands, and her horrific memories for company. I liked the description on how she’s using intense hatred and anger to distance herself from the terrors of her memories. Anger against Lex, against herself, Lois, Gabe, Clark… anyone and everyone who was even peripherally connected to what happened to her.

Sadly, I can easily see how Lex would end up becoming the easiest and most obvious target for all that rage. Even in this state of near maddened anger, Chloe wouldn’t want to say anything that would truly hurt and damage her relationship with Gabe, Lois or Clark. She wouldn’t be able to rant at them about what happened to her, and how it was all their fault… not without causing some serious ruptures in their relationship, as well as needing to explain exactly how, what, where and WHY it was their fault.

It would be so much easier just to rant at, and blame Lex for everything that happened to her. Not only wouldn’t she have to explain her convoluted reasoning as to the ‘why’, BUT he would probably not even fight back. He’d just take her anger and blame as his due, apologize, and just keep accepting more… no questions asked.

Poor Chloe and Lex. Despite my fears about Chloe and Lex being trapped in this vicious kind of blame game, where he is martyred to her unhealthy mad rage, I still think their best chance at recovery is to recover together. Lex needs Chloe to tell him that she forgives him… that she’s actually grateful for everything that he did to save her. And Chloe needs Lex to tell her that she’s STILL beautiful, pure, whole, strong and untainted from everything that happened to her. That she’s STILL an innocent, from any perspective, and she shouldn’t keep regarding herself as irrevocably broken.

The poor, emotionally shattered kids. I look forward to seeing them find the path towards slow recovery. Please update soon, Nonky.

[Kit Merlot]

Chloe had lived. Lex had lived

As horrible as this is going to be for Chloe to endure, I hope she remembers that she and Lex have survived everything that Lionel has thrown at them--I hope the abusive rapist is spinning in his grave.

I also like that Chloe has Lois to lean on-she's going to need all of the support she can get.

Continued excellent work on this gorgeous fic.