The Lesser of Two Evils - NC-17, Chapter 56 (May 27, 2016)

[kitten]

Hey, that's my corpse!

Well, not my corpse, but the corpse of the thread that I started. I'm it's mother . . . it's neglectful, horrible mother who let it go to the graveyard . . .

*absorbing guilt trip*

*resigned silence*


*several counselling sessions later*

I've brought Miss Vickies and peanut butter cups. Also my Damien Rice CDs. I just want it noted that my therapist says this isn't healthy. (If I were to consult a nutritionist, think of the scolding then.)

It's not as if I don't want to complete my stories. I do. But look at the bed I've made for myself. There's LoTE Lex, who's trying so hard to be a good man when he probably shouldn't care at all. There's Trauma Lex who I've been flaying on the altar of Chloe's mental breakdown. There's Lex from Acceptable Wisdom and Nudge, who is so deliciously jealous. In Onyx I have Lex, obstinate fellow that he is, and his serious counterpart Siris. You know I love a complicated man. And Seth has been wagging handcuffs and a few other things at me. I have the stalkery Lex of Witness Protection and For the Record. I have the devoted married Lex of Survival. I have the surprisingly juvenile Lex of Billionaire Muggings. Add in car-sex Lex, billiards playing Lex, chess-metaphoring Lex, and several versions of angsty Lex and the total is 23 Lexes.

Imagine it if you will, dear reader, 23 Lexes and each one wants me to play just with him. Then consider the several Lionels who wander around to drag me into the gutter conveniently located next to the Lex bed, plying me with drinks. Lucas arrives to flirt from time to time, too, and sometimes Fine. Geoff Nichols is looking at me with a wobbling lip and a chiding expression. He's very vulnerable and I think I could talk him out of his pants if I'm nice.

I'm constantly amazed I've been able to focus on a single (or double Lex) for the length of a single chapter. My updates could be single sentences as I flit from one story to the other. Wouldn't that be frustrating? I could be the LANA of fic authors . . .

*shudders*

So, yeah, that's why it takes so long - not a lack of love but too much.

*grumbling from 23 Lexes*

Not that I'm complaining. I just don't want my chapters to degrade into disjointed strings of "thrust" "eyebrow" and "lick" . . . Not yet anyway.

[somethingeasy]

Hey, that's my corpse!

???

Well, not my corpse, but the corpse of the thread that I started. I'm it's mother . . . it's neglectful, horrible mother who let it go to the graveyard . . .

*comprehension* !!!

*several counselling sessions later*

I've brought Miss Vickies and peanut butter cups. Also my Damien Rice CDs. I just want it noted that my therapist says this isn't healthy. (If I were to consult a nutritionist, think of the scolding then.)

oh dear, I certainly didn't want to drive Nonky into therapy... Those straitjackets would make it impossible for her to get any writing done.

And may I say that I LOVED this long rant of a post. I just wanted to cuddle it and go to sleep with my body curled around it. Mostly because of the descriptions provided for 'Nonky's list of Lexs'.

There's LoTE Lex, who's trying so hard to be a good man when he probably shouldn't care at all.

I actually think of him as the ultimate in in Martyred-Guilt-Lex. Mostly because this is the one version of Lex who actually deserves all the recriminations he is piling on his own head. The only reason the viewers have been able to forgive him (and love him), is because he's trying so desperately hard to make amends for his thoughtless actions in the first few chapters.

There's Trauma Lex who I've been flaying on the altar of Chloe's mental breakdown.

LOL! I like the imagery of Trauma-Lex as a sacrificial lamb to Trauma-Chloe... although 'lamb' is too gentle and docile a creature to be applied to ANY version of Lex. Perhaps Sacrificial Bull? heh heh he.

There's Lex from Acceptable Wisdom and Nudge, who is so deliciously jealous.

oooohhh. Jealous Lex... especially irrationally and unreasonably jealous Lex is always my favourite kind. I barely got a taste of this fellow in Nudge, and I (and all the other readers, of the howling din of reviews is any indication) can't wait to see more of Lex bristling in his hypocritical jealous wrath.

In Onyx I have Lex, obstinate fellow that he is, and his serious counterpart Siris. You know I love a complicated man. And Seth has been wagging handcuffs and a few other things at me.

THREESOME!!! 'nuff said!

I have the stalkery Lex of Witness Protection and For the Record.

Right next to my adoration for Jealous-Lex, I always get a special thrill from reading Stalker-Lex. There is just... something about the obsessive fellow that gets my heart pounding (in fear and terror as well as in heated delight).

I have the devoted married Lex of Survival.

I don't think I have re-read any version of Lex more than THIS one (except Lo2E). Devoted-Lex combines all the things I love reading about different incarnations of Lex (Jealous-Lex, Obsessive-Stalker-Lex, Kinky-Lex, Charming-Seducer-Lex, Manipulative-Scheming-Lex, etc, etc) and brings them ALL out for the viewing display of the reader... because THIS version of Lex is generally not afraid to be open about his emotions.

I have the surprisingly juvenile Lex of Billionaire Muggings.

LOL! I never would have imagined I could have loved this Prankster-Lex. But I DO... so much! Mostly because I keep getting images in my head about the ridiculous situations he keeps putting himself into... such as being jealous of a tree-frog for clinging to Chloe's cleavage... and then poisoning himself with said tree-frog's venom.

But, besides the fun, hilarious factor, I think I love Juvenile-Lex because he is so obsessed with winning... no matter how paltry the rewards or how much cost and effort goes into being 'the one who has the last laugh'.

Add in car-sex Lex, billiards playing Lex, chess-metaphoring Lex, and several versions of angsty Lex and the total is 23 Lexes.

Bloody *&%^& Hell! 23??!!! I don't know whether to pity Nonky... or whether to rip her head open to get those 23 Lexes for myself.

Sadly... I'm leaning towards the latter.

Imagine it if you will, dear reader, 23 Lexes and each one wants me to play just with him. Then consider the several Lionels who wander around to drag me into the gutter conveniently located next to the Lex bed, plying me with drinks. Lucas arrives to flirt from time to time, too, and sometimes Fine. Geoff Nichols is looking at me with a wobbling lip and a chiding expression. He's very vulnerable and I think I could talk him out of his pants if I'm nice.

heh. Oddly enough, I actually always suspected there was a party like this in Nonky's head. All right, I didn't suspect anywhere near to THIS level of chaos, but reading through her fics, I did sometimes sit back in awe and wonder how she managed to keep all her Lexes on the straight and narrow and separated from each other. Not to mention separated from the Lionels and Geoffs that she also seems enthralled with.

Milton Fine's appearance came as a complete surprise though. LOL! But now that I think about it... hmmmm. Let's get him out onto a fic too, shall we?

I'm constantly amazed I've been able to focus on a single (or double Lex) for the length of a single chapter. My updates could be single sentences as I flit from one story to the other. Wouldn't that be frustrating? I could be the LANA of fic authors . . .

*shudders*

So, yeah, that's why it takes so long - not a lack of love but too much.

*hits the bad thought of 'being Lana' clear out of Nonky's head with a sledgehammer*
There we are, no more nasty thoughts like that.

Poor Nonky. We (the rest of your readers and I) commiserate and sympathize with your situation of just 'too many Lexes'. Of course we understand how it must be difficult to focus on a single Lex when so many of them are clamouring for love and attention. And they need the love... every single one of them is too needy and neurotic to be able to survive for long on their lonesome without someone taking care of them.

I'll try to be patient... I'm not used to being patient... in fact, I've never attempted it before. But how hard can it be?

*grumbling from 23 Lexes*

Not that I'm complaining. I just don't want my chapters to degrade into disjointed strings of "thrust" "eyebrow" and "lick" . . . Not yet anyway.

hmmm. I rather like these words; let's see what can be done with them... Lex thrust his eyebrows as he licked... nahh! Lex licked an eyebrow as he thrust? Lex thrust his licking as he eyebrowed?
That's just wrong! But it sounds so close to being right

I look forward to seeing YOUR re-arrangement of nouns and adjectives, Nonky. Whenever you're ready (this is me being patient.... proud of me?).

[teejei]

There's LoTE Lex, who's trying so hard to be a good man when he probably shouldn't care at all.

There's Trauma Lex who I've been flaying on the altar of Chloe's mental breakdown.

*looks at Sab* Sacrificial Bull? *shrug* Flay away.

There's Lex from Acceptable Wisdom and Nudge, who is so deliciously jealous.

I snicker at Jealous!Lex. All those thoughts running through his mind and all the things he wants to do....

I have the stalkery Lex of Witness Protection and For the Record.

This Lex is one of my favorites. You'll be updating these, too, after Nudge, Trauma, LoTE and Onyx, right?

I could be the LANA of fic authors . . .

Oh don't you DARE!

[somethingeasy]

*sigh* I know I have been casting a MOUNTAIN of a vote for Nudge, but the truth is that, I have just finished re-reading some choice scenes in this fic... and I remembered all over again why I once called this my FAVOURITE story in the entire forum.

I LOVE this story! No other piece of fiction has inspired such intense emotions from me. No other story has had me crying for Chloe as hard (not even Trauma), screaming in fear from Lionel's malevolences, or raging at Lex at his most stupid and thoughtless of actions. Horror, loathing, heated arousal, sympathy, love, tenderness, hate, terror... this fic has inspired a whole symphony of emotions, and I get the feeling it's only going to get better/worse before it's finally over.

It's horrible that THIS fic... MY FAVOURITE FIC is in the graveyard. Oh please do resurrect it with one paltry little chapter, Nonky. There is something so.. wrong about seeing this one in the graveyard.

[SVfan1286]

All I can say about this story is that I absoultely fantastic. I fell so bad for Lex, I don't really even know why but I do. All I have to say about Lionel is he better get his times ten.*evil bastard*

I hope at the end Chloe can fully trust and forgive Lex, and can move on with her life.*with Lex* *wink*

Please update soon!

[somethingeasy]

All I can say about this story is that I absoultely fantastic. I fell so bad for Lex, I don't really even know why but I do. All I have to say about Lionel is he better get his times ten.*evil bastard*

I hope at the end Chloe can fully trust and forgive Lex, and can move on with her life.*with Lex* *wink*

ooooh, can I give my personal opinion on why I feel so bad for Lex? Lex has always had this bizarre tendency to believe himself to be unworthy of love or loyal companions. It's a nasty combination of having all the people who genuinely loved him 'abandon' him in some way or another... AND his tendency to surround himself by generally nasty, superficial, untrustworthy socialites and society-elites who continuously betrayed his trust time and time again. Rather than seeing that he's been unlucky in relationships, Lex doesn't seem to believe in coincidences, and thinks that HE is the reason why all his loving and friendly relationships turn to s**t.

And then comes Chloe. A person who is loyal, kind, gentle, intelligent and generally a better class of person than the kind that Lex has been hanging out with. And the first time he met her, he all but raped her. Now as he's discovering all these amazing qualities in Chloe, he's only feeling more and more guilty about his actions during the first few chapters. His self-loathing is actually growing in proportion with his increasing regard (and attraction) towards Chloe.

Basically, he's miserable, and becoming more so as he finds himself falling in love with Chloe. I cannot imagine how HORRIBLE he's going to feel when he finally acknowledges that he's in love with her, but I anticipate a LOT of self-inflicted torture and recriminations.

*grins* of course, this self-loathing will immediately start dissipating once Chloe tells him that she forgives him, that she trusts him... heh, that she LOVES him. And I for one, am looking immensely forward to that chapter.

Any chance of an update, Nonky? Or am I being a demanding harpy? hmmm, nahhh!

[somethingeasy]

hmmmm, I seem to remember Nonky mentioning that she was working on the new chapter of this fic...? Any chance of plot progress on this story?

heh, Nonky warned us that Lionel is only going to become more dangerous and evil before he is finally neutralized... he's already creepy on a factor of twelve (from a scale of one to ten)... WHAT and HOW much more can he do to the Chlex couple??!! Chloe and Lex are already teetering on the edge of separate nervous breakdowns, I can't imagine how things are going to be worse before they start getting better. heh, but I'd love to find out.

Please update soon.

[Kit Merlot]

hmmmm, I seem to remember Nonky mentioning that she was working on the new chapter of this fic...? Any chance of plot progress on this story?.

Yes I seem to recall that Nonky mentioned that she had a chapter of this exquisitely tortuous yet highly enjoyable fic completed.

I'm not trying to be a psycho stalker, but I adore this story, and I can't wait to see how you resolve all the angst, if you resolve it at all.

Oh hell, who am I kidding? I totally want a happy Chlex ending, one where Chloe can fully enjoy having sex with Lex, and one where Lex is able to fall as deeply in love with Chloe as he actually wants to.

I don't want a lot, do I?

[somethingeasy]

Yes I seem to recall that Nonky mentioned that she had a chapter of this exquisitely tortuous yet highly enjoyable fic completed.

I'm not trying to be a psycho stalker, but I adore this story, and I can't wait to see how you resolve all the angst, if you resolve it at all.

Oh hell, who am I kidding? I totally want a happy Chlex ending, one where Chloe can fully enjoy having sex with Lex, and one where Lex is able to fall as deeply in love with Chloe as he actually wants to.

I don't want a lot, do I?

Nope! I think you're being really quite reasonable in your demands. Chloe and Lex, defeating BruteMonster!Lionel, getting over their traumatic issues and falling woobily in love with each other... sounds good!

heh, and don't you go about calling yourself a psycho-stalker. That's MY title!!! You can be my Evil Minion if you want. I'm going through a phase where I'm collecting Minions. You get a club jacket upon membership.

[skauble]

You can be my Evil Minion if you want. I'm going through a phase where I'm collecting Minions. You get a club jacket upon membership.

And it's super entertaining to see the shock when you go all evil on Sabrina...not that *I* would ever do that.

*Grabs GL Lex and runs*

~Sarah~

P.S. Yeah, nonky. What's up with the lack of LoTE Lex??? I'd even take some LoTE Lionel. Mmmm...magnificent bastard Lionel.