Title: Lactose Intolerance - PG?
Disclaimer: Smallville stole my soul from Doctor Who. Unfortunately, it didn't come with any rights of ownership.
Author’s Note: Slightly silly double-drabble (200 words exactly in Word) written off the prompt "lactose intolerance".
@~~~
It was well after midnight when Lex finally returned to the penthouse. He was exhausted, spent. All he wanted to do was crawl into bed and sleep until morning.
Right after he had something to quench his thirst.
Bypassing the wet bar--wine at this time of night always gave him heartburn now...growing old definitely had its drawbacks--he entered the kitchen, pulled down a glass from the cupboard, and grabbed the milk out of the fridge. Even living in Metropolis, Chloe insisted on farm fresh milk in glass bottles. Something about the cardboard containers robbing it of its taste.
With a shrug, Lex downed the milk in one swallow, then nearly dropped the glass to the floor when he heard a bark of laughter. Chloe was standing just inside the kitchen, eyes sparkling with amusement. At his questioning look, she pointed toward the open fridge, unable to stop giggling long enough to use her words.
Lex was just about to something to that effect when he spotted a bottle with the words 'fresh milk' on the top shelf. Glancing down at the bottle in his hands, he realized his mistake.
Written in Chloe's careful handwriting was one word:
Breastmilk.
I liked them all, but my favorite is the one where Fine dresses up as Spike for Halloween.
I was ROTFLMAO at this hilarious little ficlet. I loved the build-up, where the ambience and tone was carefully, gently set up for the reader. It was slowly made clear that this is a warm, relaxing and soothing night for Lex, where he finally gets to unwind after a hard day’s work. It’s also made clear that this scene takes place in a fairly bright version of the future for Lex, where he’s obviously older, but not harried, paranoid, depressed or any of those other things which help him make his own life miserable. Not only that, but it’s soon made clear that Chloe is very much an integrated part of his life.
All in all, It’s a good future for Lex over here… even if he IS feeling the effects of age, and cannot indulge in his alcoholic over-indulgence like he used to.
The sweet, gentle, relaxing future setting had been set up beautifully, and made the final punch line all the more effective because the fic started off so soothing and relaxing, LOL!
Poor Lex! I think he might end up going back to drinking scotch, vodka, wine or even beer rather than take milk before bedtime again, ROTFL! Never mind that alcohol gives him heartburn… at least he would be guaranteed that the alcohol won’t be something that’s been squeezed out of a human being!!!
Never mind that the human being in question is his beloved wife… I’m sure Lex still found the idea to be icky and repulsive.
Although, I can’t help but think that Lex probably has tasted Chloe’s breast milk before. He’s the obsessive kind of sensationalist who would want the full immersion during sex, which means tasting Chloe’s mouth, skin, pussy and even her breast-milk laden nipples.
But tasting some sips of breastmilk during good sex is quite different from chugging it down with a bottle, eh? LOL!
wonderful, been sat giggling at my computer instead of working (and laughing out loud as well so co-workers know I am not really working that hard . . .)
I decided it's time to revive the lovely drabble thread
Lex stood at his mother’s grave, a bouquet of chrysanthemums clutched at his side.
“Happy Birthday, Mom.” He cleared his throat nervously before he whispered, “I remember, Mom. I remember what you said about blood on my hands.”
He glanced back at his family, waiting for him at the car. “Chloe and our daughter Julianna are the best things to ever happen to me.” He knelt down and laid the flowers next to the gravestone. “I won’t screw it up Mom, I promise you.”
Lex traced his mother’s name with his fingertips before placing his hand over the words Beloved Mother. “I love you, Mom.”
He walked quickly back to the car, a happy yet wistful smile on his face. Chloe had been right that he needed to visit his mom’s grave by himself. Next year, when Jules was older, he’d introduce her to her grandmother.
The ghost of Lillian Luthor watched her son and his family leave the cemetery. She was relieved to see that her boy was on the right track, and that he would be alright. Lillian nodded to herself and then disappeared.
KATHY
"Don't quote me to me!" Detective Danny "Danno" WIlliams, Hawaii Five-0, episode 1.8 Mana'o
"This could barely fill up Thumbelina!" SALIGIA by westwingwolf
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My livejournal: An Accused Heretic
That was great Kat.
"Everyone seems normal until you get to know them. "
Thanks and I decided to post this other psuedo-drabble i had on my lj--it's a a 245 word Chlex Halloween drabble for you:
“I swear, only Lex Luthor would get married on Halloween!”
Chloe could hear the catty voices of two of Metropolis’ snootiest socialites halfway across The Talon. “And to have the wedding in this backwater dump?”
The two women were so scandalized that they failed to see the approaching figures of Lana Lang Ross and Lois Lane Kent until it was too late.
“You do both realize that everyone can hear you right?” Lois asked snidely.
Lana leaned in conspiratorially as she whispered, “In other words, Lex and Chloe can hear you.” She waited a beat before speaking again, “At they aren’t too pleased.”
Both Lois and Lana broke apart so the two unfortunately dim-witted souls could see just how much they were irking the newlyweds.
Now Lois leaned forward again. “So I’d shut your traps if I were you before…” and here Lois paused dramatically.
She and Lana exchanged a quick look before Lana finished Lois’ sentence. “We throw your ugly asses out of here.”
The two socialites nodded before scurrying out of the way of the bride’s two matrons of honor.
They grinned at each other before throwing Chloe a triumphant thumbs up.
Lana glanced around, clearly enjoying herself. “Who’s next?”
Lois and Lana were determined to give their two friends the biggest, splashiest wedding that Smallville had ever seen and they were damned if they would let anyone spoil Chloe and Lex’s happiness.
Even if they had to beat up half of Smallville.
Last edited by Kit Merlot; 26th December 2013 at 18:26.
KATHY
"Don't quote me to me!" Detective Danny "Danno" WIlliams, Hawaii Five-0, episode 1.8 Mana'o
"This could barely fill up Thumbelina!" SALIGIA by westwingwolf
My Fanfic Master List
My livejournal: An Accused Heretic
This is very good.
Megs
“The world is full of obvious things which nobody by any chance ever observes.”
― Arthur Conan Doyle, The Hound of the Baskervilles
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