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Thread: Over - G

  1. #1
    So Savvy
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    Over - G

    Hope you like it...

    Over

    Bubbling laughter…sand between toes…bright days…hot nights…completion…

    “Did you ever think it would end like this?” he whispered to her, his face shrouded in the dim lighting of the intensive care unit.

    Chloe’s now dull yellow eyes pooled with tears as she grasped his hands with the last of her strength. “No.”

    I’m sorry…were it found sooner…beyond our means…I’m sorry…helpless…

    She went no further, waiting for him to continue.

    His pause seemed to go on forever only distorted by the intermittent beeps of a machine.

    “I did,” Lex replied, gazing unblinkingly at her, memorizing her.

    The tear escaped, its journey impossibly slow. “How?”

    His voice only echoed what everyone who ever saw their happiness thought. “It was too good to be real.”

    Bubbling laughter…cool breeze…ocean spray…I love you…so much…completion…

    The tear scraped past her harsh cheekbone. She just had too say it. “I’m sorry.”

    The tear disappeared into blond hair, the beep of the machine now a continuous whine.

    “Me too.”

  2. #2
    NS Full Member
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    Re: Over - G

    It's good, but it's so short! I'd love to see a little backstory.

  3. #3
    Maybe not so done? Reese's Avatar
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    Re: Over - G

    I'm with 'Bama! It's good...but too short! I'd like to see some backstory, too.

    Keep it coming, Sparrow! This has much promise!

    Reese

  4. #4
    Yes, I am that Fabulous Senior Member tigerbaby's Avatar
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    Re: Over - G

    Do not repost the story if it has already been posted as I now have to delete the original from the board. Just add in the rating and I will move it when that's been changed.
    Last edited by tigerbaby; 23rd June 2005 at 21:51.

  5. #5
    Administrator Senior Member Julie's Avatar
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    Re: Over - G

    I'm backing up Tigerbaby here. When a moderator moves your story because you didn't follow the rules, read the rules. Then do as the moderator asks you to, do not repost your story. This can lead to many doubles all over the board.
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