TITLE: Boys Will Be Boys
AUTHOR: ~Kat~
E-MAIL: gemkat5@yahoo.com
DISCLAIMER: The only thing I claim to own is the insane idea that formed this story! Everything else is borrowed!
SPOILERS: Anything from seasons 1 & 2!
RATING: PG-13/NC-17 (1 chapter gets gritty)
PAIRING: Chlex, Clana, and poor lone wolf Pete
SUMMARY: Pete has a sense of humor. Clark is Pete's friend. Ergo... practical jokes happen when they put their heads together! The girls get sick of it and seek revenge (with a little help from Lex of course)... that turns deadly. This is AU, Humor/Suspense/Halloween--so I put it here in 'General' if that's wrong-please let me know and I'll repost appropriately.
A/N: The preface for the first part is that Pete, Clark, and Chloe got into hot water with Miss Sheriff while trying to help someone in trouble. As punishment, she made them serve Community Service by cleaning up 'Bug Boy's' house so it can go on the market. (I couldn't get my Muse to write out that story line no matter how hard I tried, so I gave up.)
*Special Note* The first chapter has 'very mild' Chlex interaction. Bear with me; I make up for it eventually! WARNING!!!--- For Those Who Must Know---Chloe and Lana are friends in this one... so you can't say I didn't warn you... but read it anyway! Give me Lana bashing, I don't care, so long as you read the thing! :biggrin: I hope you all enjoy!!!!
~Kat~
Boys Will Be Boys I
Lex pulled up to the curb just as Pete and Clark came crashing out of the house laughing. Clearing the porch steps in a single bound, they hit the overgrown lawn and doubled over in hysterics, giving each other a high five.
They both turned their heads at hearing Lex close his car door.
"Aw, man. He's going to ruin it!" Pete complained, as he they watched him casually walk toward them. "Clark, ask him not to do anything," Pete whispered.
"Hi, Clark, Mr. Ross," Lex greeted looking at them curiously.
"Hey, Lex," Clark replied, slightly uncomfortable. "What brings you out here?"
"I've been volunteered by our lovely sheriff to supervise the community service group," he replied cynically. "Is everything ok?" he asked, noting how nervous they both were acting.
"Yeah, everything's fine," Clark answered innocently while Pete secretly jabbed him in the ribs, urging him to ask Lex not to interfere.
"I thought Miss Sullivan was supposed to be here with you?" Lex inquired.
"Oh, she is. She's in the house," Clark answered, gesturing back over his shoulder.
"She should be coming out in about..." Pete added, checking his watch. "Thirty seconds." Then he looked pointedly at Clark. "Hurry up and ask him!" he urged between clenched teeth without moving his lips, before giving Lex an exaggerated innocent smile.
"Right, Uhm...Lex?" Clark started. "Could I ask you not to go into the house just yet? No matter what you hear."
Lex looked at them curiously and opened his mouth to ask why when a shrieking, toe curdling feminine scream was heard from the higher levels inside the house.
Clark and Pete gave each other conspiratory glances before turning their eyes back toward Lex, neither of them able to hide their smirks of amusement, though not for lack of trying. Clark chuckled and smiled guiltily at Lex.
"It's a fruit bat," Clark explained, shrugging his shoulders innocently.
More screaming was heard, along with the resounding crash of splintering wood, breaking glass, and finally a slamming door.
"And a 'little' one at that!" Pete added, ignoring the noises behind him while holding his hands close together to emphasis the size of the creature. "We wouldn't do anything to hurt her!"
"No!" Clark affirmed with wide eyes. "We just wanted to scare her a little, that's all." He added, a sly grin reappearing on his face.
"We consider it retribution for all the times she dragged us with her on her investigations," Pete voiced.
"You don't have to explain to me," Lex said starting to chuckle despite himself. "Though, Clark," he added with feigned sternness. "I'm surprised you would do something like this to one of your friends."
"Shit!" Pete exclaimed suddenly in a stage whisper. "Here she comes!"
"Hide!" both boys yelled, and took off running in opposite directions around the sides of the house, leaving Lex standing by himself.
They were barely out of sight when Chloe came out of the house almost at a full run. She jumped over the porch steps in the same manner the boys had before her, landing on both feet, dropping to one knee, and hitting the dirt with her hands before sprinting forward all in one fluid motion.
"Lex!" she screamed in relief at seeing him. She grabbed the sleeve of his coat and skidded to a halt, hiding behind him. "You have to kill it! I'll do anything! Just go get it!"
"Chloe," Lex voiced calmly while she grabbed at his coat, trying to push him toward the house.
"Anything!" She repeated, and peeked around his elbow to look up at him. "Do you 'know' what I'm saying?!" She shoved at him with both hands on his back, making him move half a step from the simple force of her efforts before she peeked at him again. "I'll wash your car! I'll wash all your cars! But you 'have' to find 'that thing' before it..."
Suddenly something hit the inside of the screen door of the house causing it to open a couple of inches before closing again. Chloe froze, her eyes growing wide at seeing something flying around on the other side of the screen. She let out another ear shattering scream before turning tail and running for Lex's car.
Slamming the car door shut she locked it before half jumping over the gearshift to frantically roll up the window on the driver's side, locking that door as well. Seating herself on the passenger side she closed her eyes and focused on breathing. 'Thank god he didn't have the convertible!'
After watching Chloe lock herself in his car, Lex turned and walked into the house. Stopping just inside the door he bent down and picked up a crumpled brown lunch bag with a string tied around it. He stood up with an exasperated sigh. He was going to call out to the boys, knowing they weren't far away, and then looked thoughtfully outside towards his car. With an amused smirk, he left the house.
Using his key to get in his car Lex slid behind the wheel and closed the door, locking it just to make Chloe feel better. Her eyes still had a wildness about them when she looked at him.
"Chloe..."
"I'm 'not' going back in there," she stressed with finality.
He tossed the crumpled bag with the string onto her lap. "Where are Clark and Pete?" he asked, sounding legitimately curious. "Aren't they supposed to be here with you?"
She stared at the brown bag for half a minute before her eyes hardened with realization. "I'll kill them!" she gritted between clenched teeth, grabbing the bag from her lap in a fist. "Ooh, they are 'so' going to pay for this!" she seethed, unlocking the door to get out of the car. Turning around, she bent down to look back at Lex. "I'm 'still' not going back in there!" she reaffirmed and closed the car door.
Lex watched her get in her own car with an amused smirk. 'I had a feeling that would be your reaction, Chloe,' Lex thought as he drove off in the opposite direction. 'This should prove to be very interesting.'
~
Stepping behind the counter, Lana tossed the damp rag toward the sink, watching tiredly as it completely missed her target to fall to the floor. With a heavy sigh, she bent over to it pick up, wiping at a dirty spot on the tiles while she was stooped down.
Hearing a noise at the door, she quickly darted up to look around warily. After letting out her held breath, she chuckled lightly to herself, shaking her head for being paranoid, and tossed the rag into the sink.
Walking around the counter, she decided to check the doors even though she had locked them herself. Plus, she was expecting Clark and Pete to show up soon to help her move things from the storage room. It was always flooding and the Talon was losing money on wasted supplies. At her request, Lex arranged for a contractor to come in to refinish the entire room.
She frowned when she reached the doors and found one of them unlocked, taking a wary glance around the coffeehouse, swearing she had heard a faint noise behind her.
"Clark? Pete?" she called nervously.
With her hand on the unlocked door, she stood still, listening for the slightest sound. After a minute of not hearing anything she again shook her head and chuckled at herself for being paranoid. "You're losing it, Lana," she joked with herself, figuring she hadn't locked the door after all.
Just as her hand touched the bolt to lock it, the door opened with a rush from the other side, causing Lana to cry out and jump back in surprise.
"Lana, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to startle you," Lex apologized from the open doorway.
"It's ok," she assured him, placing her hand at her chest with relief. "I guess I'm just being a little jumpy tonight."
"Did something happen?" he asked with concern.
He was impressed at how dedicated Lana was with the karate classes he had set up for her, and though she had proven that she could take care of herself, she was still a little cautious at being in the Talon at closing time.
"No, everything is fine," she replied, finally giving him a smile, her shoulders relaxing noticeably.
"Where's Clark?" he asked, searching the room behind her with his eyes.
"He's not here yet," she stated, sounding slightly irritated. "He and Pete are supposed to come over to help clear out the storage room for the contractor to work tomorrow."
Lex bowed his head boyishly, chuckling to himself with a full smile on his face.
"What?" she asked, a smile forming on her own lips in response to his rare one.
He looked at her knowingly, still holding a grin, and backed up a couple steps to open the door at his back. There, outside at the curb, was Clark's truck.
Lana expelled a sharp breath of disbelief at seeing the truck, and then turned her eyes to Lex. "So, I 'did' hear something, didn't I?" she asked rhetorically before her expression changed to incredulous. "I don't believe those two!"
Just then a noise was heard from the back room of the coffeehouse, a definite tell tale sign that 'someone' was in the shop.
"Lex?" she asked, taking off her apron and tossing it over the nearest upturned chair. "I'm done here, would you mind driving me home?"
"It would be my pleasure," he replied, continuing to hold the door for her as she slipped past him. Closing the door behind her, Lex locked it and turned to escort the young lady to his car.
"Chloe," Lana voiced with mild surprise at seeing her friend sitting in Lex's car.
"Hey," she replied in greeting, getting out so Lana could get in the back of the Ferrari. "My car broke down and Lex was giving me a ride home," she explained before asking, "Guess there was no coffee to be had, huh?"
"Uhm..." Lana stammered from the back seat, looking at Lex guiltily as he got in behind the wheel. She hadn't even asked him why he stopped by the Talon so late. "I'm sorry, I got distracted by two of our favorite guys," she said dryly.
"Oh?" Chloe chimed with interest, getting back in the front seat. "What are they up to this time?" she asked with cynicism.
'Those boys are doomed if these two team up for revenge.' Lex smirked to himself as he pulled away from the curb, listening as Lana heatedly explained to Chloe exactly what their male friends were up to just before he had arrived.
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