The Weight of Nothing, R, Nov. 5, 2009

**kitten** · 6th November 2009, 01:56

Disclaimer: I do not own the show or characters, I don't make any money writing them, and I am not a crook.

Spoilers: Season five maybe.

A/N: Out of nowhere, because I didn't feel like scrubbing the bathroom right now. This IS being productive, I can say to myself. Rated for somewhat graphic, somewhat abstract sexing it up.

He doesn't look at her differently from how other men don't look at her, and he never had.

Lex Luthor should have stopped noticing her by now, and Chloe knew it. She knew it as a teenager, then as a young woman. She knew it as his bride's maid of honour, and as his former best friend's, current greatest foe's right hand. She knew it as the woman he chose nearly at random from the crowded birthday gala he had thrown himself.

He wasn't looking elsewhere because there were better gowns on taller women. He wasn't looking elsewhere because they hated each other – because she'd never hated him, and often saw his point better than Clark's. He wasn't looking elsewhere because she was sober and working instead of drunk and flirtatious.

He wasn't looking just because he had her hand in his, pulling her gently but firmly to see his etchings. He didn't strain his vision in the dim office with a fold-out bed. He glanced up and down along with his hands twisting and creasing her out of her clothing, but he didn't drink her with his gaze. He didn't bask in her . . . whatever she had that he'd wanted, if only for a while.

Chloe wasn't shy and she knew she wasn't hideous. She knew he liked being there with her from the low, rumbling purrs she kept surprising from him. She knew he was hard without any extreme measures from either of them. She knew he nearly came on her dress as her first orgasm ended in more gyrations bent over his lap than he'd expected.

She also knew he didn't move to light so much as a single candle to see her, though she felt him not looking almost as hard as his thrusts. She knew every time her eyes opened to search out his, his blue orbs were squeezed shut or his chin was awkwardly pointed off to the side. She knew he kissed and throbbed and pinned deeper and rougher after she tried to look at him.

She knew it until he drove into her millions, perhaps billions of times. Maybe a thrust for every dollar to his name, turning her to quivering muscle twitches and short screams. She knew he had to have looked at least once to get her hands over her head and neatly wound in one of his own.

She knew the incalculable number of orgasms and wet, heavy heat of his slump down on her nearly broken form were not consideration for her. He barely looked at her, and she knew he had no reason why he should. She was used to being overlooked, used to men having no particular draw to her physicality. It didn't bother her. Lex bothered her, though.

The next morning, eyes closed and barely waking, he had tried to hold her down with him. Even after she escaped, she spent every LuthorCorp event knowing he wasn't looking at her so deliberately he must be giving himself a headache.

**westwingwolf** · 6th November 2009, 03:45

I like the distance Lex tries to show as if Chloe means nothing when clearly she means something, and that no matter how hard he tries he can't fool her. I wonder just how many of these encounters have they had and how many more will they have.

**ThraceC** · 6th November 2009, 04:34

Beautiful writing. Painting everything as a negative perspective comes out feeling so real. I hope short story doesn't mean that's it though I admit it could stand alone ppms! Damn it I just realized this is complete! Which I should have realized.... Nonetheless I really liked it but I want more. I was in the middle of another one of your fics anyway so I guess I won't be completely deprived

.

**somethingeasy** · 6th November 2009, 19:23

This was an excellent ficlet. Nonky, I always find it amazing how you always manage to insert such deep levels of depth, insight and meaning into a fic that doesn’t even reach a 1,000 words. It’s amazing!

I loved Chloe’s philosophizing and analyzing of the attraction that other men hold for her… a very specific form of attraction… one that involves the men drooling after some of her qualities (either her body, or her mind, but seldom all of her). How Lex is mimicking the attraction as demonstrated by all the other men, and how much Chloe cannot tolerate it.

I also loved the idea that Chloe knows that Lex is merely mimicking the other men’s shallow assessment of her whole, and is not just avoiding looking at her because he finds nothing to see… On the contrary, I get the feeling that Chloe knows the reason he’s not looking at her is because he’s chicken-sh*t afraid of being overwhelmed by her, and losing himself in her. The damned cowardly bastard!

The smut was awesome! I loved how it held the same tonal quality of ‘deeper connection desperately avoided’ that shadows all of their interactions. And I ALSO loved how, the morning after, Lex couldn’t help but betray his need by trying to cling to her before she extricated herself and left him by his lonesome. Heee… you might think you’re hiding away your need, Lex, but Chloe can see right through you, and she thinks you’re all the more pathetic for trying to hide away your obvious, desperate need for her.

I really liked the idea of Chloe not being willing to accept a compromise. If Lex wants her, then he’s going to have to admit to his need for her… he’s going to have to friggen look at her. But until then, she’s not going to stick around providing him with the free comfort and support that he’s stoically not asking her for. He wants cuddles in the morning… he’s going to have to friggen ask for it!

Fantastic fic, Nonky! Thanks for writing it. I look forward to any other ficlets you’d like to post in the future.

**hfce** · 8th November 2009, 05:56

Interesting and angst filled. Lex is not fooling anyone with his act.

**Booksketeer** · 9th November 2009, 03:05

What a sad, sad situation. It's heartbreaking, for both of them really. It seems as though there's nothing there for either of them but really mind blowing sex, and I wonder if perhaps they're using each other to punish themselves. This is a wonderfully written story! Very angsty and thought provoking; you've really packed a lot in a little story. Great job!

**autumngold** · 22nd November 2009, 16:01

What a great story! I feel so sorry for Chloe, she is so used to being used and ignored. Why would Lex treat her any different? I just wish that they both could realize how important they could be to each other. How much better they could make each others lives. Maybe someday?