Title: Little Pink Riding Hood
Author: westwingwolf aka Mindy
Rating: PG-13
Spoilers: None
Disclaimer: I do not own anything to do with Smallville, Grimm's Fairy Tales, Disney, or the book that I mentioned: The True Story of the Three Little Pigs. I do, however, recommend that as it is an excellent children's book.
AN: I'm still working on Suitable Specimen, however this story came out during a conversation I had in the shoutbox with someone who will remain nameless (though her name does appear in the story). This may have been thought by others before me, but I always figured that the lesson in Little Red Riding Hood was never a good one. So I changed it and gave it a Smallville twist.
Little Pink Riding Hood
“Story time!” was the shrill sound of Chloe’s youngest daughter, Sarah, who always pushed her mother for a story just before she went to bed. Or first thing in the morning. Or on the way to school.
At just six, the child was smart enough to read far above that of even the above average first grader and had a vivid imagination to create her own stories. However, she still loved to hear her mother tell her classic fairy tales. Well fairy tales with a twist, but Chloe’s versions were better than the Brothers Grimm and had more realistic lessons than Disney.
“Okay, what should it be tonight? The True Story of the Three Little Pigs? Or about how Cinderella outed her pseudo sister for being a horrible person, told the prince where he could shove that glass slipper and then met and bantered with the even hotter and way smarter dark prince?” Chloe asked as she tucked her child into her comforter that was done in a jade green shade with purple trimming.
“No, I want to hear my favorite story.”
“Little Pink Riding Hood, again?”
“Yes, please.”
“I told you this one last night and the night before.”
“But it’s the best story ever and you’re the best Mommy because you made it up and tell it so well, and if you tell it to me, I promise not to ask to hear it again for at least … a week.” Sarah gave her best smile that somehow managed to still be a smirk.
“I see that your father has been teaching you how to deal so I’ll indulge you. Okay, Once Upon a time…”
Little Pink Riding Hood was on the way to her friend Clark’s house. Her Aunt Nell had sent her with a bunch of flowers to give to Clark’s father. Pink never thought to ask what a man would want with flowers because if something had nothing to do with her, then she didn’t care. Before she left, Aunt Nell gave Pink explicit instructions not to go anywhere near the mansion because a wolf lived there and liked to roam the grounds looking for naive young girls to trick with his cunning thinking and quick wit. One would think that Pink wouldn’t have to worry about encountering the wolf since Clark’s farm was just across the street and the mansion was across town, but Pink was never the smartest of young girls and became easily lost. Truthfully, she got herself into these situations on purpose so someone would save her.
Pink had decided to contrive just a situation for this outing and walked towards the mansion. She walked right into the mansion like she owned the place and asked to see the wolf. The wolf, who was bored because his favorite reporter was busy, decided to see if he could mess with the girl to pass the time. He was a wolf after all and this was his nature. Plus the little girl was an easy target.
“Didn’t anyone tell you that the mansion is a treacherous place, and little girls should avoid it or else suffer atrocious consequences?”
Pink turned to see the wolf dressed in a handsome purple dress shirt and sleek black pants. She had to mentally kick herself for thinking that the pants did wonderful things for his butt because she was a lady and they did not think such naughty thoughts. After staring at that part of the wolf’s anatomy for a while, she finally remembered that he had spoken to her, though she only understood about half of his words so she answered the best way she could.
“I’m Little Pink Riding Hood and I’m named so because of my pink hoodie. It also has a reversible black side. You may call me Pink.”
“Very well Pink, but you haven’t answered my question.”
“Oh right, umm… could you ask me it again, only slower and with smaller words.”
“Weren’t you told not to come here?”
“Oh, yeah! My aunt said that you were a bad wolf and that I should stay away. Are you bad?”
“Well, yes, according to narrow-minded people like your aunt and the Kents, I am bad.”
“Cool. Hey, I know the Kents! I’m supposed to be delivering these flowers to Mr. Kent with a note from my aunt that I’m not allowed to read or let Mrs. Kent see. I really just agreed to do this because I wanted to see Clark. See, I want him to be my boyfriend. But not right now because I actually have a boyfriend who abandoned me to go fight for the country or something boring like that. I just want Clark to know that he can be my boyfriend when Whitney dies or whatever. I’m also visiting because I don’t have anyone else to talk to about my parents who died when I was three because some stupid rocks fell from the sky. Actually the rocks aren’t that stupid. It’s my parents who are stupid for abandoning me when I was just three to be raised by my aunt, and given anything I could ask for including my very own horse when I could have ended up on the streets. The rocks are kind of cool and pretty. I made a necklace out of one but then I lost it because of Clark. He can be so mean to me sometimes. But he’s really cute and I think our love is meant to be…”
The wolf had tuned the girl out somewhere between boyfriend and dead parents, but he knew he had to stop her soon in order to move on with his plan and still have time to meet up with the reporter for some fun.
“Well don’t you think you should get a move on then?”
“Huh? What? Oh right the Kents, well see I kind of got lost and I don’t know how to get there or back to my house.”
The wolf found this hard to believe since there was only one main road in the town, but decided to let it go since it helped with his plan.
“Oh you are such a nice wolf, well not really but I bet I can change you and make you into a good wolf, if you want to be my next boyfriend, after Whitney and Clark, of course.”
“No! No please don’t do that or even think that, just take my directions and leave.”
He gave Pink the wrong directions, which meant he told her to go left instead of right, and sent her on the way. He figured the girl would eventually find her way because he actually had heard of her and knew that the idiotic males in this town found her attractive. Probably had something to do with that necklace she kept blabbering on about missing.
The wolf jumped into his Aston Martin and sped to the Kent farm. He snuck onto the farm and opened the pen to the cattle to let them roam free. He hid behind the barn and only had to wait mere seconds while Jonathan screamed to his wife and son to help him get his precious cattle back. The wolf was quite lucky that Martha seemed to be shooing the cattle farther away from the farm, and Clark’s tactic of heat vision did nothing to make the cows want to get nearer to him.
He ran up to Clark’s barn loft and found a pair of jeans and a flannel t-shirt that he swore never to wear again after he was done with this trick. He made a quick phone call and then waited. By some ability of Pink always showing up when not plausible, he didn’t have to wait long.
“Pink, I need you to keep at least ten feet away from me.”
“Why? Clark? Are you keeping secrets from me? Do you not love me? Are you going to abandon me too?”
“What?! No, you idiot, I’m just sick.” The wolf was quite lucky that Pink had either hadn’t heard him clearly or had been called an idiot enough that she no longer noticed it anymore.
“Okay, well as long as it wasn’t something I did. But if you get me sick despite the fact that I’m not leaving and staying as far away as possible from your germs, then I’ll never forgive you.”
“Duly noted.”
“Oh Clark, what not so big muscles you have!”
“The better to not crush your simple brain with, my dear.”
“Oh Clark, what a shorter height you have!”
“The better to make sure I don’t knock my head against a doorway, my dear.”
“Oh Clark, what a big club you have!”
“The better to knock you unconscious with, my dear.” The wolf did just that and then the reported appeared with a sack full of meteor rocks and a saw.
“What took you so long? I was afraid she was going to come on to me again.”
“I had to finish up a story for the Torch. Plus, I was just listening now and I think that was her idea of coming on to you.”
“Oh ... well, come on, let’s hurry up before she wakes up or Mr. Kent finds all his missing cattle.”
Together the wolf and the reporter cut open Pink and filled her belly with meteor rocks. Not only was Clark unable to get within a 50 foot radius of her, but the rocks also reversed whatever power her necklace had once given her. She was now so unattractive that even the other meteor freaks ran from her. Served her right for being a drama queen who searched for someone to save her and for trying to take the wolf from the reporter with whom he rightfully belonged.
“The end, now go to bed.” Chloe said as she kissed her daughter on the forehead.
“Mommy, would you have gone to the mansion to see the wolf?”
“Yeah, would you have?” Chloe turned to the voice of her husband, smiled at his ability to still sneak up on her, and then turned back to her daughter.
“Yes, but not because I would want to have someone save me, I would have gone because the wolf is an interesting and complex creature who deserves love no matter what seemingly selfish and manipulative tendencies he may have.”
“Good answer, now you heard your mom, firecracker. Goodnight.” He also bent down to give his daughter a kiss on the forehead.
Together they turned off the light, no night light necessary for their daughter, and shut the door. When they entered their bedroom, Chloe wrapped her arms around her husband and pressed herself against him.
“Oh Lex, what a big surprise you have!”
“The better to please you with, my dear” he said before he gave her his best wolf grin and dropped them both on the bed.
The End
Reply With Quote
.jpg "asarstar's Avatar"){kind=avatar}
Bookmarks