Initiation, NC-17 (April 4, 2010)

Disclaimer: I do not own the show or characters and make no money writing them.

Spoilers: Up to Season three.
Rating: NC-17
Words: 4000
A/N: This was originally started with the prompt ‘first time.’ As I was writing it progressed from a PWP based during Chloe and Lex’s partnership to a rather involved character study of them at that time. Hopefully the two elements work for you in concert.


Chloe Sullivan really thought she was too old for some things. She'd begun to feel over shiny, pretty things that had only fleeting value- basically only useful long enough to make someone else covetous. It was harder to pick out what her father should get her for Christmas, though she knew he needed the help. She no longer fussed over housework that needed doing, or homework that bored her. She was mature. She had patience and forbearance.

Before she had started screaming at Lex Luthor she could have sworn she hadn't had a tantrum in a dozen years. From the full, almost solid feel of the words she was hurling at him, she could swear it was as plotted to persuade him as any debate for ethics class. Her body was actually jutting out at him, crouched lower to get at his centre of gravity. This wasn't their playful lines shot off fast and loose, intended to sideswipe without doing harm. She wanted to fight him.

She wasn't lying about him, but the wild accusations probably sounded insane. She didn't know where he stopped her because the rant seemed to keep going in her mind. It continued to his father – her blackmailer – because she couldn't help but see Lionel's posture in Lex's arrogance. She was trapped and it was long past desperate. She was reverting to snapping at anyone, even the man she'd asked for help. Showing her a dead PI in the morgue was the kind of dramatic intimidation his father used to put her in her current predicament.

He kissed her, just to shut her up. Anyone else and she would have laughed, but Lex made it seem like an action real people might do in a public hallway in the face of the hysterical ranting of her mounting paranoia. He just grabbed he face and stuck his tongue where the noise originated.

Brash and fearless imaginary Chloe would have slapped him and gone on her way. She leaned in and tipped her head back so far he had to keep her upright. Hot, wavering lines of lust had to be drifting off the top of her head. She clung to him and kissed back as hard she knew how. Teenage boys' intensity did not prepare her for Lex. She had thought she knew how to kiss.

“I’m not my father,” he sneered at her, inches away from her gaping lips. “Do you think I'm the same kind of man he is?”

Chloe didn't think anything, but her head shook itself. She was taken by both wrists and moved in front of Lex, being marched out to the parking lot. He was very close behind her. His grip was tight as he steered her through the hospital. People were probably looking and wondering who the stupid girl was that Lex Luthor was dragging around. He stopped next to his car, and she regretted letting him drive her to the hospital. She needed a ride home or back to the castle for her car.

“Where is this happening,” he asked impatiently.

“Where . . . ?” He was angry, but gentle. His eyes were blazing, flickering up and down her body, moving and redirecting. It was making her nervous. They had emotional distance and she liked it. Where had that gone?

“My place, your place, a hotel,” he rattled off. “Unless you say no, I'll be inside you very soon.”

It wasn't a threat. Her virginity had been threatened before, and her stomach hadn't given a little leap of excitement then. It wasn't no, but she couldn't be somewhere real and familiar while they did this. Chloe would have to deny this later, to herself maybe, and to Lionel if he found out.

He drove them to the hotel dangerously, one hand to steering wheel, the other alternating between shifting gears and holding her wrist. Lex didn't look at her the whole way there. He held her hand more gently while they were in the lobby, then in the room he yanked her clothes off. She was on her back on the bed, shivering, by the time she caught up to his nudity. He wasn't huge, but he didn't have to be when she wasn't very tall. She'd spent too much time in a chair, being a bookworm. Bare muscles were intimidating, especially the sweaty places that formed when he lay on top of her.

Her hands were loose because he was delving between her legs with his fingers. She put her hands on his chest and tried to decide how the tentative brushes of his fingertips were so incredibly different from her own touch. He leaned down to kiss her and Chloe cupped his face. Lex pressed nearer. His erection was probing her, a little too high to penetrate, but good to grind on. She liked it all, but he was really up close. He was trying to get closer and her mind was skipping on the thought.

“I haven't done this before,” she stuttered.

Lex was immune to surprise, because he rolled back and got a condom with absolute calm. She trembled as he came back, and he frowned at her. “Just don't scream like I'm killing you,” he smiled, arching his signature eyebrow. “It's a nice hotel.”

Chloe clutched the blankets to her chest, her face going pale. She knew he was joking. Lex wasn’t cruel to women he dated. Most of them nearly killed him trying to hold on to him, and he was the one who ended up in the hospital.

“Now you’re imagining horrible things,” Lex frowned. “I shouldn’t have teased you.”

His hand held under her chin, fingers stroking over the constellation of moles on her cheek. “You’re very pretty, Chloe. It’s a very nice, uncontrived attractiveness that keeps you outside of any blonde stereotypes. I’ve thought so for a long time but it seemed inappropriate to say so. Under the circumstances, I think you might forgive the lapse.”

His blue eyes were sending warmth over her skin, making Chloe feel charmed even as she noticed he’d avoided any talk of feelings. He had complimented her, expertly, but he hadn’t said anything that obligated either one of them to do this again. She felt safer immediately. Lex wasn’t lying to her or exaggerating anything for her benefit.

“Yeah,” she murmured. “I’m not imagining horrible things.”

“Good.”

Lex slid the condom package somewhere out of sight, and cuddled her in his arms as he kissed her deeply. Chloe let her hands rest on his sides and got used to the sensual glide of his tongue against hers. She let the heat and excitement build up. The nervous chill subsided before she knew it, and there was nothing left to do but continue.

He settled her back to her pillow and put the condom on. Chloe watched with wide eyes. He didn’t try to conceal or display himself, just let her look if she wanted. Lex had a nice cock, not huge but certainly not small. He was ridiculously fit for a guy with a desk job, but she supposed his playboy reputation required some effort to maintain.

He came back to lie on top of her, moving slowly and deliberately. Chloe was somewhat frozen, fighting a maidenly resistance to being dominated, no matter how gently and politely Lex was going about it. He slid his hands under her hips, steadying her as she couldn’t quite contain a nervous arch of her back. There was a small skirmish over where her knees should be, then he was notched in the wet, pulsing spot that ached vulnerably.

He met her eyes briefly, then closed his with a tight grin. Lex brushed his lips over the tops of her arms and along her collarbone. He gave her time to absorb his presence. Chloe tried to find a word for it, and she had to settle for a string of them. He made her feel small, feminine, and uniquely threatened in a benevolent way.

“Chloe,” he asked softly.

She realized he was asking her permission, and cringed inwardly at the nervous flip of her stomach. “Okay,” she told him, feeling silly for it but telling herself to be brave.

He broke her hard, and it was dizzying pain. Chloe didn't make a sound, but he did as her whole body jerked. His chest vibrated on her nipples like he was rolling the R of a word he hadn't said completely. It echoed gutterally.

Chloe had pushed up on him, her palms flat on his chest as she strained down into the mattress. His hands were still there, keeping her from digging in between the springs and escaping.

Holding me still, she thought. Keeping me where he wants me.

Chloe knew she was panicking in a distant part of her brain, but her body reacted to the fear. She had always wondered what rich people did, how they thought, where their limits were located compared to the average person. It was overly simple to think there was a bratty pettiness to all of Lex’s actions, but it wasn’t altruism driving him. He used his power over people, and she had lain down and let him do exactly that. It might have been a huge mistake.

Stupidly, her frantic move to stop him was to reach down to where he was. Her hands didn't recognize her own gleaming breasts and belly as they slid along, framed by large, masculine arms. She definitely couldn't understand how her sore body was jammed open by him. Chloe's fingers trembled over her own short curls and she couldn't go any further. She knew the edges of her pussy were pushed back plumper and wet, shining around his cock. She knew what it would look like but the image was impossible. She couldn't be dealing with inches of him when she felt sealed around him like cling-wrap, head to toe.

She moaned, and twisted her head away before he could get her hair out of her face. “Chloe? Chloe, we can stop. We should stop,” he gasped softly.

She nodded. He needed to stop being huge and on top of her. He needed to be not so hot and everywhere. It wasn't fair to her. He knew she was a virgin until a few minutes ago, and shouldn't that get her a little mercy. He started to withdraw and she realized he was a Luthor – not built for mercy either physically or emotionally.

Out hurt too, as did the sad look he tried to hide as he lay back beside her. Screw this, she thought. Her legs curled up and she knelt above him. He was still in the condom and hard. Lex sat up.

“No, sweetheart, that's going to burn like hell. You're too tight.”

He spoke quickly, but his hands were on a delay. She was already halfway down on him when he grabbed her by the waist. She rushed to beat him, choking as the jolt to her pussy made her queasy. She couldn't let him have all of this for himself. On top was supposed to work better for women.

“Jesus, you'll need stitches,” Lex muttered, his forehead crinkled into lines carved out of tension. “Slow down. What are you trying to prove?”

Tears were flooding her eyes and she looked at him helplessly. Nothing had made sense for so long, and especially nothing of that day. She just needed something different to feel like herself again, but she had no idea what it was. There was a hint of it whenever Lex asked her opinion, or when he trusted her with information she knew no one else had.

“I don’t know. I don’t know who I’m trying to fight anymore, and I don’t know how to win,” she whispered. “I’m scared of this but I want it. One second I feel powerful and the next I’m weak and dizzy and I need you.”

Power was difficult, Lex thought. It was even more difficult to realize power came and went without warning. He could understand Chloe’s frustrated desire to tame it, use it somehow. It was there in her, but it was complemented by morality and optimism. She would probably never be comfortable with the things she was capable of doing. He didn’t know anyone utterly comfortable with their power who wasn’t also a monster.

“Hold on,” he told her, pulling her arms around his neck. “And go slowly. Come down on exhales, and lift up when you breathe in. Try to relax.”

Her body spasmed as if on cue, clenching on his cock and reminding Lex the last thing he should do with Chloe was presume to tell her what to do. She’d inevitably disobey magnificently.

He helped her move, following her body up and down with firm palms on her sides. Chloe closed her eyes and negotiated the width of him. She wasn't brave enough to push all the way down on him, nor could she risk sliding too high on his shaft and losing him. She was probably only working the middle of his cock, rubbing a few inches raw. Lex was regarding her with heavy eyelids, but he wasn’t seething with passion. She obviously had to do more. Her hips loosened up and she tried bouncing on her knees. The friction was sore but she knew it was finally building steadily.

“Chloe, you're hurting yourself,” he mumbled, cupping her chin.

“You're hurting me,” she argued. “Show me what to do!'”

Lex stilled her hips and made them tip in a medium rhythm, like only that part of her body was jogging.

“Good girl,” he said blissfully.

Chloe gripped his shoulders and shoved them back into the headboard, making sure it hurt him. Damned condescending Luthors were always making her turn her back on good sense. He helped her balance, showed her a rhythm that worked her hips, but wouldn't let her speed up. Nothing was going to happen unless he was rougher, or let her be rough.

Chloe's ass rose off his lap and the cooler air of the hotel chilled until she was back down. Lex had cupped her breast but his eyes were on her throat. He was supposed to be her saviour. When she lifted up again, the chill felt like the morgue table underneath her nudity. She wondered if he would stand above her corpse and look as haunted as his face looked now.

He was scared for me, she realized. The morgue field trip wasn't about making me feel worse – he was trying to express concern.

She leaned in and kissed him, very softly. He caught his breath and let it out in a slow tickle over her cheek, then he was clutching her to him so tightly she couldn't keep moving on him. Lex was digging his fingers into her hips as she squirmed, but he patiently settled into the long, deep intimacy. He was giving her all of him, and Chloe felt filled. She would die if she had to move, the angle would rip her up. His arms tensed, but he didn’t rush her back to moving.

“Let me down,” she murmured.

He eased them to their sides, shifting them into an easy missionary position. Chloe's fingers grazed down his chest to hug him. Her eyes opened to look at the flicks of tendons in his neck. He propped up on his elbows and stared deeply. She had never seen anyone with that look. Hot, complex and blazingly simple, she interpreted it immediately. He didn't just want to fuck her, not just that. He wanted to make her come.

Lex's hands rolled into fists on the mattress, and pushed in closer against her ribs. She blushed in odd places, a pink suffusing her belly and arms in addition to the colour in her cheeks and chest. Compared to her typical independence, her little hands pulling at him were endearing. She scrubbed her breasts hard on him and learned him with steady progress. He knew he’d hurt her at first but he fit very nicely in her now. A few more times and Chloe would take him easily from any position. She was genuinely open to things, her boldness holding up under his first heavy thrust.

“Oh,” she cried, lifting up to look down their bodies.

“Hurts,” he asked, putting weight off her onto his arms.

“No, it’s just . . . deep. It’s different.”

“More,” Lex said, nuzzling at her earlobe. “It works better with your legs up around me.”

She had seen it in movies, but the motion was surprisingly hard with trembling limbs. Chloe linked her ankles and hissed at the mingled soreness and heat. Her whole body felt it. Even her toes were curling and dragging over his lower back. She clawed at Lex restlessly.

“I don’t know how to move like this.”

“Yes, you do,” he said, nipping along her neck.

He pulled out most of the way and let her feel the anticipation before shoving back into her pussy. Lex made sure he didn’t go too fast, but there was a corresponding series of warm compressions inside Chloe. She would probably be sore anyway, but she was enjoying herself. He could read her responses and make her scream. He could take care of her and give her pleasure.

Lex fastened his mouth over hers, driving his tongue wildly against her inexperienced one. Chloe let her hands fall to the bed and held on. She let her body twist and bounce with him as he led her toward orgasm. It was close. She twitched and arched, hauling with her legs around him as he created a void inside her that she’d never known was there, then filled it with his body.

Sweat was breaking out on them, and Lex hovered above her with a wolfish stare. He let Chloe tear away from his mouth, her face turning to the side as she gritted her teeth. Her inner muscles clamped and released, pumped at his cock until he was amazed this was her first time. Chloe was going full speed toward the end, her body heating up and purging harsh gasps. She stiffened, lifting up and pressing her breasts on him. Her mouth opened and she sucked in air desperately. Her belly trembled on his skin. Lex held the thrust and angled just slightly up.

She screamed, loud enough to make him flinch under other circumstances. He let the bridled energy in his groin pour out in an imagined spill inside her. One of her hands grabbed the back of his neck and Lex collapsed into her damp softness.

He enjoyed her shivery aftershocks for a moment, the phantom orgasms dwindling pleasantly on his cock. Lex reached back and brought one of her legs down, the other falling to the bed. He sighed and flexed his sore back. Virgins were stressful and not without terrors for him as well. Chloe was uncommonly sensible and he didn’t expect she’d dissolve into a bimbo after the act. He was more concerned about pulling out before the condom could leak. She was far too smart to miss college because he’d knocked her up.

“I have to get the condom,” he said softly, kissing her hand as he eased it off his neck.

“’kay,” she mumbled, her body trustingly limp.

The slow drag away from her body incited tiny pains he could watch played out on her face, but she didn’t complain. There was no large amount of blood, and Lex had done his best not to hurt her. She sighed and rolled her head along the pillow, licking reddened lips.

Chloe drifted on a sweaty haze, her eyes cracking open as Lex got up. He peeled off the condom and tied it. She watched him walk to the bathroom and shut the door. Water ran as she thought about her pillow talk. Their typical conversations were about Lionel, so that didn’t seem right. She couldn’t tell him about high school after he’d just taken her virginity. Mutual friends were out of the question. Honestly, she wasn’t sure Lex would welcome any talking.

In the bathroom, he ran water to warm and studied the gleam of Chloe’s juices on his fingertips. He should have gone down on her. She would have loved it, if the orgasm she had from fucking was any indication. It would have made her more comfortable for penetration. If he hadn’t been so angry and hurried, he would have insisted.

Maybe there will be a next time, he thought. She doesn’t hate me and we’ve been seeing a lot of each other.

He winced at the thought of his earlier stunt. Dragging a teenage girl to the morgue to view a murder victim was at least a new tact in his ways with women. He’d wanted her to accept the seriousness of her situation so she would give him all the information she had. Chloe was more positive than he was that Lionel could be defeated.

Lex washed his hands and wet a towel to bring back to her. He made himself amble slowly across the rug and climbed in casually. Chloe shifted her legs apart so he could ease her with the warm compress. He put an arm companionably across her waist.

“I’m sorry I kissed you to shut you up,” he told her. “If nothing else was wrong with it, it was unbearably clichéd.”

Chloe’s mouth pulled to one side, smirking with a lush pout. “Apology accepted. And it’s not like I didn’t enjoy it.”

She had put her hands over her breasts, and Lex folded the covers over her. He rubbed her side and felt her purr a little appreciative sound.

“I shouldn’t have taken you to see a dead body. It was manipulative and unnecessary. You’re not stupid and you know my father is dangerous,” Lex said. “I had this nagging feeling you were holding back, and I wanted you to trust me.”

Green eyes touched on his nudity and the hotel bed. “I trust you, Lex. If I didn’t trust you I wouldn’t have come to you for help. It’s just – not everything can happen like this did, you know. It’s not a spur of the moment thing to spill your guts. It’s complicated.”

She pulled her arms out from under the blanket, holding his hand against her belly. He sighed.

“Because I’m his son.”

“And mostly because I’m not entirely innocent in all this, so I do have to carry some of that myself,” she corrected. “It’s a really huge mess that’s been getting on a lot of other people’s lives. You keep me safe and I’ll do my best to clean it up.”

They lay together for a while, his arm growing heavy across her belly and Chloe’s fingers winding in with his. Eventually Lex found himself blinking sleepily. He shook his head in amazement. He would never have predicted she could make him drowsy and content in such a short time. He had been furious with her a few hours ago.

“Should we talk about my taking your virginity,” he asked, half-jokingly.

Chloe’s head tilted on the pillow, and she stroked her chin. “Hmmm, I don’t think so. Unless I did it completely wrong and you need to explain how it actually goes in my nostril or something, I think we’d only get into awkwardness.”

“Okay.”

She turned to her side, happy when Lex spooned behind her. His head could rest above hers, and she felt tiny and cherished. Chloe sighed. She had been ready to run away from him in his library, but faced down her fear and let him kidnap her first to the morgue, then a hotel. He was never willing to stay either a threat or an ally.

“You’re a nice guy to lose your virginity to, Lex.”

“That’s nice of you to say, but I’ll refrain from having t-shirts made up to that effect. My reputation is bad enough without literally advising people to lock up their daughters,” he quipped.

They stayed for a while longer, Chloe lying soft in his arms and he trying to convince himself saving her life was no more vital than it had been before. There was a tension coiling alongside the pride in her trust; strands the colour of golden hair nearing breaking.

That was such an amazing study of these two through Chloe's first time and their first time together (because let's face it, these guys are so gonna have sex again). I liked the realism in that it wasn't perfect right away. They worked at it and it got better. No schmoopy romance, just natural Chloe and Lex. And the idea of the t-shirt will have me laughing for days.

i liked the story

now where do i find one of those shirts :)

It was a very unique and different take on the "first time" trope oft displayed for readers. I like that it captured who they are. It's a battle and a struggle, with neither expecting quarter and none given. I think above all others, it captures who they are to each other at this point in their lives. I like that even as they have sex (for I don't want to call it making love since they didn't do that), there is this thread of distrust because Lex is Lionel's son and Chloe is the smartest person on the show. More than well done (exactly how I do not like my steak, but here it is more than acceptable ;))

Thank you for the new fic!!
I want a shirt too!!!
Hope you update soon!!!

Damn that was both harsh and hot. :rofl: Only Chloe and Lex can make the first time so damn hard. Lord have mercy that was a tough read but worth it in the end. :)

A very realistic story of the awkwardness and eagerness of Chloe's losing her virginity to Lex--no stupid fireplaces roaring for these two:grin3:

It sucks!

Thank heavens someone was brave enough to say so! I thought you'd all gone blind!

Thanks for this fic!
It was a brutally awkward and honest way for Chloe to lose her virginity, but like Chloe said who better to lose it to than Lex Luthor!!