westwingwolf
13th November 2007, 04:27
Title: WikiBeast
Author: westwingwolf and shoutbox friends
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: I own nothing except for Tory.
Summary: Lex defends the right for werewolves to eat chocolate.
AN: This comes inbetween WikiBumbed and WikiBlessed. If you haven't stopped by the shoutbox, then do so today. Who am I kidding nobody reads these stories except shoutboxers?
Chloe had just put Tory down for her nap when she passed Lex’s office. She noticed he was typing furiously on his computer which could only mean one thing.
“Who’s been spreading lies on Chlexipedia today?” Chloe knew it was best to humor her husband when he was in one of these moods.
Lex didn’t even bother to look up from the screen. “Some science freak with the random screen name of Landslide claims werewolves can’t have chocolate.”
Chloe decided not to take a stance just yet but she knew from his words what Lex’s opinion on the matter was. “Did this Landslide person give a reason?”
“Apparently because chocolate is poisonous to dogs and dogs are descended from wolves, and werewolves have wolf characteristics chocolate would be bad for werewolves.”
Chloe said her next statement slowly knowing it might anger him. “Logically, that makes sense.”
Immediately, Lex looked over at her with the expression that she was as crazy as the werewolf heretic. “I’m not denying that Chloe but it doesn’t matter when it comes to werewolves. These are werewolves; logic isn’t the first thing on anyone’s mind when it comes to these stories.”
Chloe steeled herself for the upcoming argument. “True but if you want to put some science into the story then why shouldn’t it matter? Werewolves have wolf characteristics like good hearing and sight even when they are in pure human for, shouldn’t it be reasonable that they get the bad effects as well?”
“They all ready have to deal with the pain of shape shifting, and people thinking they are terrible beings. On top of everything else, you want to take away the one of those certain things that can make people happy if they are having a bad day? When a day sucks and the world thinks you are a horrible person, you can always come home knowing your wife, child, and guinea pigs will love you no matter what. No matter if you are a werewolf. They will welcome you with open arms and a variety of delicious chocolates to put a smile on your face.”
By the end of his speech, Lex was standing at his desk and Chloe was certain that if there had been a chocolate anthem, it would be playing in the background. She could almost picture behind Lex a waving flag of a werewolf with a chocolate bar in his mouth.
She released her bright smile that had been threatening to spill out as soon as she entered the room. “I know and I fully support the idea that all werewolves love and are able to eat chocolate. I love it when you get so passionate about your ideals. It’s just too difficult not to tease you when you get in rant mode about this site.”
Lex grunted and sat back down to finish his work saying nothing more about the subject. Chloe knew she couldn’t let him stew over this all day. “It’s very sexy seeing you like this.”
Lex had not stopped typing but Chloe noticed that he slyly shot a look in her direction. She continued, “You just seem very feral like this. Really gets to me.”
At this Lex ceased typing and turned his head to her. She knew she had him but she needed to add the last bit. “I could really go for you and some chocolate syrup right now.”
Lex slammed down the laptop. “I’ve finished my work here. You get ready and I’ll grab the syrup. Do you want me to bring anything else?”
“Yeah, I’ve got a craving for a potato.”
“Chips?”
“No. Just a regular potato.”
Lex knew this could put a hold on his chocolate filled sex life but he had to ask. “Why?”
“I’ve been wondering what it would be like to be one.” She answered nonchalantly.
Against his better judgment, his curiosity won over. “You mean turn into one? Like a weretato?”
“Yeah.”
“They aren’t feral. There is nothing cool about turning into a potato.”
“They can stare at you in a feral-like manner with their eyes.” Chloe pointed to her eyes as if this made her point more logical.
“If I agree with you, can I have sex now?”
“Yes. And don’t forget the potato.” She said as she turned into their bedroom.
Lex ran to the kitchen and eagerly found the chocolate sauce. With some effort, he figured out where they kept the potatoes and grabbed one. He stared at the tuber and thought about how his wife matched him perfectly when it came to being odd.
As he entered their room, he noted. “I bet you’d be the sexiest weretato in the world and when you shifted into tater form I’d make you a bed of butter and sour cream. And if I were in wolf from, I wouldn’t eat you because I’d only want chocolate.”
The End
Author: westwingwolf and shoutbox friends
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: I own nothing except for Tory.
Summary: Lex defends the right for werewolves to eat chocolate.
AN: This comes inbetween WikiBumbed and WikiBlessed. If you haven't stopped by the shoutbox, then do so today. Who am I kidding nobody reads these stories except shoutboxers?
Chloe had just put Tory down for her nap when she passed Lex’s office. She noticed he was typing furiously on his computer which could only mean one thing.
“Who’s been spreading lies on Chlexipedia today?” Chloe knew it was best to humor her husband when he was in one of these moods.
Lex didn’t even bother to look up from the screen. “Some science freak with the random screen name of Landslide claims werewolves can’t have chocolate.”
Chloe decided not to take a stance just yet but she knew from his words what Lex’s opinion on the matter was. “Did this Landslide person give a reason?”
“Apparently because chocolate is poisonous to dogs and dogs are descended from wolves, and werewolves have wolf characteristics chocolate would be bad for werewolves.”
Chloe said her next statement slowly knowing it might anger him. “Logically, that makes sense.”
Immediately, Lex looked over at her with the expression that she was as crazy as the werewolf heretic. “I’m not denying that Chloe but it doesn’t matter when it comes to werewolves. These are werewolves; logic isn’t the first thing on anyone’s mind when it comes to these stories.”
Chloe steeled herself for the upcoming argument. “True but if you want to put some science into the story then why shouldn’t it matter? Werewolves have wolf characteristics like good hearing and sight even when they are in pure human for, shouldn’t it be reasonable that they get the bad effects as well?”
“They all ready have to deal with the pain of shape shifting, and people thinking they are terrible beings. On top of everything else, you want to take away the one of those certain things that can make people happy if they are having a bad day? When a day sucks and the world thinks you are a horrible person, you can always come home knowing your wife, child, and guinea pigs will love you no matter what. No matter if you are a werewolf. They will welcome you with open arms and a variety of delicious chocolates to put a smile on your face.”
By the end of his speech, Lex was standing at his desk and Chloe was certain that if there had been a chocolate anthem, it would be playing in the background. She could almost picture behind Lex a waving flag of a werewolf with a chocolate bar in his mouth.
She released her bright smile that had been threatening to spill out as soon as she entered the room. “I know and I fully support the idea that all werewolves love and are able to eat chocolate. I love it when you get so passionate about your ideals. It’s just too difficult not to tease you when you get in rant mode about this site.”
Lex grunted and sat back down to finish his work saying nothing more about the subject. Chloe knew she couldn’t let him stew over this all day. “It’s very sexy seeing you like this.”
Lex had not stopped typing but Chloe noticed that he slyly shot a look in her direction. She continued, “You just seem very feral like this. Really gets to me.”
At this Lex ceased typing and turned his head to her. She knew she had him but she needed to add the last bit. “I could really go for you and some chocolate syrup right now.”
Lex slammed down the laptop. “I’ve finished my work here. You get ready and I’ll grab the syrup. Do you want me to bring anything else?”
“Yeah, I’ve got a craving for a potato.”
“Chips?”
“No. Just a regular potato.”
Lex knew this could put a hold on his chocolate filled sex life but he had to ask. “Why?”
“I’ve been wondering what it would be like to be one.” She answered nonchalantly.
Against his better judgment, his curiosity won over. “You mean turn into one? Like a weretato?”
“Yeah.”
“They aren’t feral. There is nothing cool about turning into a potato.”
“They can stare at you in a feral-like manner with their eyes.” Chloe pointed to her eyes as if this made her point more logical.
“If I agree with you, can I have sex now?”
“Yes. And don’t forget the potato.” She said as she turned into their bedroom.
Lex ran to the kitchen and eagerly found the chocolate sauce. With some effort, he figured out where they kept the potatoes and grabbed one. He stared at the tuber and thought about how his wife matched him perfectly when it came to being odd.
As he entered their room, he noted. “I bet you’d be the sexiest weretato in the world and when you shifted into tater form I’d make you a bed of butter and sour cream. And if I were in wolf from, I wouldn’t eat you because I’d only want chocolate.”
The End