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Sandy
3rd May 2006, 01:14
Appointing Sex
Summary: Lex & Chloe make an appointment to have sex.
A/N: Stole this from Everybody Loves Raymond, where Debra and Ray make appointments to have sex, but they don't follow through....Oh yeah, I wasn't sure what this fell under, so I put both PG-13/R...dunno which one?
Disclaimers: I do not own Smallville, or Everybody Loves Raymond

Lex and Chloe were sitting on the sofa in the study, with their schedule books open.

"So how about Thursday?" Chloe asked. Lex shook his head no.

"Mm no. I have that meeting all night remember?" Chloe shook her head in understanding.

"Damn. Friday?" Lex shook his head no again.

"Well dammit Lex, when is it ever good for you? You're the one that's always horny." Lex blinked in shock.

"Me? You're the one who always want to do it. I can read it on your face right now. You have sex on the brain." Lex let sustained the n on his tongue. Chloe pinched her forehead.

"That's because we're making an appointment!" Lex nodded his head dumbly.

"Uh huh. That's what YOU think." Lex went back to staring at his schedule.

"Tomorrow night good for you?" Chloe stared at her schedule. It was open.

"Yeah. Now kiss me so I can go to bed and forget this whole thing." Lex smirked and kissed her passionately.

***

The next night...

Lex is in his bathrobe naked underneath. He stretches out on the king size bed, anxiously waiting for Chloe. He then sniffs his arm pits, and his nose crinkles. So he heads over to his dresser and puts some cologne on, then goes back to the bed.

Chloe comes in in her flannel red pj's. Lex's knows that he's not getting lucky tonight.

"No!" Chloe looks at him startled.

"What?"

"It works better when you wear your silky pj's." Lex complains. Chloe makes a rolling sound in the back of her throat and gets in bed.

"I'm too tired for sex." She kisses him on the forhead and goes to bed.

"Chloe, we made an appointment! You can't go back on your word." He rubs her shoulder but she ignores him, and pretends to snore. Lex throws his hand up in the air in discust, and goes to bed with no sex. I'm gonna be grumpy in the morning, I just know it.

***

The next day at the office Lex is miserable. He listens to his answering machine.

"Lex, this is your wifey. If you wan't we can have sex when you get home. Hi Lionel." Lionel snickered. Lex's face got a little pink from embarrassment. He glares at Lionel.

"You had to pick this moment to come in my office?" He said with cold eyes glaring at him. Lionel had a grin on his face.

"If work is making you too tired for, the simple pleasures in life...I understand if you want to take a leave of absence." Lionel goes out of the office snickering and laughing, leaving Lex clentching his teeth.

***

That night Lex comes home still embarrassed. He wanted to lash out as his father. Sometimes angry sex is good...Lex saw Chloe asleep on the sofa in the study. He sighed annoyingly. Looks like senior navel isn't getting any action tonight either. Hey while were talking, we might as well be unichs...

Lex just watched Chloe sleep. She was facing away from him. She open one eye. She really wasn't asleep. She just wanted to annoy him. It was a game they often played. He's so volunerable...Chloe started snickering and couldn't help herself. Lex rolled his eyes.

"So you are awake?" She turned to face him.

"Yeah." She planted a big kiss on his lips, and sat on his lap, almost straddling him. Lex's eye's widen.

"Ah, so you are in the mood?" Chloe nodded her head yes.

"Well my dear, if you follow me to the master bedroom, we can begin our "nightly activies." Hehe."

"Oh and no Tarzan and Jane."

"Oh but Chloe!" Lex pleaded.

"I said no." She stared at him.

"Fine."

They went to the master bedroom to continue their nightly activies.

The End!

kirt30
3rd May 2006, 20:31
liked it, different.

marcela
4th May 2006, 02:00
very funny lol

Alizaleven
21st June 2006, 10:32
lol! this was funny.. the end part about tarzan and jane hilarious

angelines
21st June 2006, 18:16
jajajajajajaj

starmoon
18th July 2006, 06:53
that was just funny i laughed out loud.

sylvia
18th July 2006, 18:11
Hehe what a cute concept. The Tarzan and Jane bit is disturbing, though.

hfce
18th July 2006, 18:30
That was weird but cute. :D

Ami Rose
28th March 2020, 02:02
Lmao funny cute