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PMD
19th October 2005, 21:21
Okay, here's one that I'm sure I didn't post until now. <g> It's dedicated to Amanda and the pieces I've read of her because it got my muse jumpstarted again. And I've been reading some great pieces here too---now to get her to slow down so that I can send feedback. :) So, here it is, enjoy.


Title: For Amanda - "I've Lived My Life"

Author: PMD

e-mail: mary.davidson@sympatico.ca

Rating: R/M (for language)

Category: Friendship, Chlex, slight angst, futurefic, Lex's POV, AU

Spoilers: Anything is fair game in Smallville

Summary: Lex contemplates.

Disclaimer: To whoever owns Smallville and its characters, I'm just borrowing them, will give them back, not making any money with their use in this piece, so don't sue me.

Archive: At BtS, BT2, Electricchlex, MD, N.S. Forums, SPP and the WBFFZ for the time being. If anybody else wants it all they have to do is ask.

Feedback: Yes I would love feedback.

Author Notes: This is dedicated to the author of some wonderful Chlex, one in particular, In The Details. Thank you for that wonderful piece, Amanda. And I hope I have done you proud with this one, sweetie. Enjoy.


For Amanda - "I've Lived My Life" - by PMD

~

Prologue: The leap of faith we all must take to find happiness.

~

A Few Years Down The Road



I've lived my life as my father has seen fit for so long that I didn't know how to get out of the rut---how to get out of the pit of grayness and into the light.

Have no friends---I left Clark and Lana behind and thought; this is what he wants---not myself.

Look behind your back---don't trust anybody. Okay, that was easy with a father like him and the enemies you inherit from the old man.

Be ruthless---that came easy too since I was my father's son.

Marry for aid, not love. That I couldn't do. I never loved Victoria so we never got together. I thought I loved Desiree and Helen but both were even more ruthless than my father. After that, I gave up on the idea of ever being married, be it aid or anything else---that is until she came back into my life, kicking and screaming---giving me her tiny hand and pulling me out of the depths of despair.

Yes, the last one was show no emotion and I couldn't do that either, thanks to her and coming to my senses.

I remember the day so well. I had taken over another company and was celebrating---or trying to. My heart wasn't in it---especially when my father called to congratulate me.

Seconds later the door blasted open and a very angry blonde Hazel Fury strode into the room, eyes blazing.

'You jackass!'

'Excuse me, Ms. Sullivan?'

She glared at me---eyes turning from fury to cold to hot once more.

'You used me!'

'How?'

'You used me for information and destroyed a friend’s father. How could you? I thought we were friends?'

'I don't have friends.'

'Evidently not since you use them. Lex, what has happened to you? Why are you this way?'

'I am my father's son.'

She walked around my desk and stood there, staring into my eyes. Then she sighed.

'No, you're trying to be your father's son and failing. I see it---you wanted to show him you could do it---but your hearts not into it.'

'Please leave.'

'No!'

'Leave now and never come back!'

I could see the hurt in her eyes and wanted to take it back. Instead I glared at her.

She'd let out a deep-seated sigh of pain and leaned over to touch me. I had to flinch---even though I didn't want to---why didn't I want too?

'Lex, please, Alex, let me be here for you.'

'I'm a lost cause.'

'If you were, would I be here, offering myself to you.'

My eyes widened and then narrowed. 'What do you mean? You mean you will seduce me out of this downfall?'

She moved closer, putting her hand on my arm. 'If need be, I will.'

I pushed it away. 'You’re just like the others---use your body to get what you want from me.'

'No I'm not, Alex,' she growled.

'So, what makes this different?'

'What makes this different is that I want you---not what you can give me---I love you, Alex. But I guess that's not enough. I'll leave and never darken your door again, Mr. Luthor. Have a horrible life.'

I watched her turn from me and move towards the door. I gasped as she left the room and remembered whispering:

'Chloe, don't leave.'

At that moment I knew, for the first time, I would never live my life as my father saw fit. If she never came back to me, I would search her out and tell her how I felt---or die trying. For I would die without her by my side.


"Hey?" brings me out of my thoughts.

I look and smile as I watch her walk towards me. She comes to my side of the desk and I lean in, kissing her belly, wide with child.

"Hello, little one," I breathe.

I look up at her. "Chloe, thank you."

"For what? For marrying you or for looking like a basketball for the past month?" she quips.

I laugh gently and take her hand, kissing it. "For that and so much more."

"More?" she asks, her eyes lit with wonder. "Tell me what's the more?"

"How long do you have?"

'The rest of our lives."

So, I leave the work behind and lead her to the couch to talk of who I'd been before I met her, after I met her, and loving her till we die and beyond. And how she changed my life from being my father to being a man who would rail against men like him.

I've lived my life for my father for so long I didn't know I could change until I saw my last chance at happiness leave the room. But a whisper brought her back---and love keeps her here---mine and hers---for each other and our friends. And our future that we created, nestling in her body.

The End.

Donutte
19th October 2005, 22:14
OMG that was soooo beautiful! It made me cry... I kid you not... I love that she did hear him... That she came back... And they are living happily ever after...

summer_enchanted
19th October 2005, 23:29
Aw, that was so sweet. Really enjoyed it. :clapclap:

PMD
19th October 2005, 23:30
Hey Donutte:

Awww---now you're making me cry. Happy tears only---happy tears only. Glad you enjoyed the piece. :)

welshy
20th October 2005, 00:57
aaawww that was so sweet :)

PMD
20th October 2005, 01:05
Hey Guys:

summer enchanted: Awwww. Glad you enjoyed it, sweetie. :)

welshy: Awww. Glad you enjoyed it too, sweetie. :)

sweety167
20th October 2005, 06:53
Oh hun, I loved that!

PMD
20th October 2005, 19:14
Awwww----glad you enjoyed it, sweety. :)

starmoon
27th October 2005, 23:15
great story and i am glad that it ended happly because the deserve to be happy.

hfce
27th October 2005, 23:53
Oh my that was so sweet. :wub:


Hope :)

PMD
30th October 2005, 09:33
Hey Guys:

Starmoon: Awww---glad you enjoyed it, hon. :) I wish they could have their happy ending on the show but if it can't happen there, it can certainly happen in fanfic---thanks to a lot of great fanfic writers on this site. :)

Hope: Glad you enjoyed it, sweetie. :)

Ami Rose
10th December 2016, 13:20
Beautiful