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teejei
3rd March 2005, 23:29
Carrier of a Secret
Rating: G-PG13...just to be safe
Pairing: Chloe/Lex
Spoilers: Truth
Disclaimer: The four lines of dialogue were taken from a transcription of episode18, season3. Complete script of the episode can be viewed here (http://www.twiztv.com/scripts/smallville/season3/smallville-318.htm). Lyrics of the song over here (http://www.sissel.cc/carrier.html). None are mine, though to have Lex on eternal loan would be truly appreciated. *grin*
Summary: Of all the things Lex Luthor could admit to Chloe, it had to be about him yearning for his father's love. Chloe ponders what it must be to know a Luthor secret.

A/N: Second fic, un-beta-ed. Constructive criticism please. Very open to suggestions for improvement. Ü

~*~*~*~*~*~
Carrier of a secret
No one wants to know
Show a little conscience
Guardian of the palace
No one wants to go
Broken hearted monster

“Why do you keep doing this to yourself? Why can't you just walk away from your father?”

“Because he won't give me the only thing I've ever wanted from him.”

“And that would be?”

“I want him to love me.”

A heartbeat later, he realizes his slip and the fall of his usually cool façade further affirms his admission. I’m probably more shocked than he’ll ever be. I don’t think even Clark Kent could’ve coaxed that secret out of Lex Luthor.

Tell me the words that'll touch me
Tell me what's hurting you so

Carrier of a secret
Let your secret go

He’s still reeling from the moment; I could sense him having an internal rant and berating himself for being so cocky. Truth serum be damned!

He’s the one who asked to meet here in the mansion. He knew I inhaled his latest K-experiment at the plant. He willingly exposed himself to this meteor-related “power”, knowing I would get only the truth to every question I ask. Now why the hell was THAT his answer?!

He could’ve said he wanted Lionel to bequeath LuthorCorp to him. He could've said he wanted Lionel to stop meddling in his personal life. He could've said he wanted Lionel to give him the freedom to develop LexCorp.

Yet he revealed what his heart must be yearning for the most. His deepest, most sincere wish; the love of his father.

Carrier of a secret
Whispered in the dark
What are you afraid of
Carrier of a secret
Hidden in your heart
Show me what you are made of

I could've questioned him further. I could've threatened to reveal his secret, unless he grant me a complete, on-the-record exclusive interview. I could’ve blackmailed him into giving me anything I ask for. Worse, I could’ve taunted that he’ll never get Lionel to love him, that he’ll never deserve it.

How many mountains must you climb
How many tears must you cry
How many seasons must go by
Before you let your secret fly
How many mountains must you climb
Before you let your secret fly

Yet I chose to remain silent. No words are necessary or even appropriate.

I hope you understand that this current silence is to extend indefinitely, Mr. Luthor, I think to myself. Most people might think that to be privy to a Lex Luthor secret is to be doomed with a burden, a life threat, or worse…a curse.

Let it fly -- let it light the sky above you
Let it fly -- let somebody try to love you

But to me, Chloe Sullivan, it’s a blessing.

To be the carrier of your secret is a privilege I wouldn’t dream of forfeiting. Thank you for trusting me, Lex.

~*~*~*~*~*~
Featured song === "Carrier of a Secret" by Sissel

kitten
4th March 2005, 01:18
:wub:

I love that scene and every interpretation of what happened after the camera cut away. Great use of a song and wonderful inner monologue from Chloe.

It's nice to see someone realizing when Lex makes a sacrifice and leaves himself vulnerable, with out turning around and taking advantage of it.

Ami Rose
4th March 2005, 01:23
Wow! I almost started crying. I loved it!

Lots of Love,
Ami Rose :devil:

star del mar
4th March 2005, 06:13
I loved it! I love new twists on Chloe and Lex interactions. A blessing, i liked that

Steph*

autumngold
4th March 2005, 07:14
Excellent take on Chloe's feelings!! I really like this story!! :yay: :chlexsign3: :yay:

starmoon
15th March 2005, 08:59
Well written and interesting.

bluengreenswmer
25th April 2005, 04:51
I love your take on this scene. When I saw the actual scene, I knew there was more to it that what they showed, and I love when people expand on it.

hfce
25th April 2005, 04:57
That was just beautiful. :wub:

arkakitty
1st July 2005, 22:41
Awww nice how she is trustworthy ... I want to hug him ...

Loved it. :)

PMD
2nd July 2005, 09:46
Teejei---you have such an amazing touch with those two, there is no suggestions I could ever give you about it. In fact, if I had betaed it---there would have been no changes. :) Well, done, sweetie. And might I add---I thought it was so incredible that the creators allowed this secret to be told to Chloe cause I know deep in her heart, she would hold it forever a secret. Lana---she would have told Lex to tell his father---that would not have been a good idea. Chloe knows what Lionel's all around---Lana's view of it would have been through rose colored glasses---Chloes, through the darkest shades ever.

teejei
8th July 2005, 08:22
to everybody who gave FB on this one-shot, THANK YOU SO MUCH!!! :wub:

this being one of the first fics i have ever posted here, it's such an honor having such big names come and give FB. :worship: i hold all your fics close to my heart, drawing inspiration for my own fics, and also using them as reflections on Chlex as a ship and individually.

again, thank you everyone for the FB. :love2:

starmoon
4th November 2005, 21:24
Teejei---you have such an amazing touch with those two, there is no suggestions I could ever give you about it. In fact, if I had betaed it---there would have been no changes. :) Well, done, sweetie. And might I add---I thought it was so incredible that the creators allowed this secret to be told to Chloe cause I know deep in her heart, she would hold it forever a secret. Lana---she would have told Lex to tell his father---that would not have been a good idea. Chloe knows what Lionel's all around---Lana's view of it would have been through rose colored glasses---Chloes, through the darkest shades ever.

chloe is very smart and it is great that lex trusts her enough to tell her something so privte.