Lel
25th November 2004, 14:42
Title: Lost
Chapter/Work in Progress/Complete: ?
Author: Lel
Pairing: Lex/Chloe
Rating: PG-13 (1 use of bad laguage)
Summary: When happiness turns to grief how would you cope?
Content/Warning: AU - Very Angsty.
Spoilers: None
Disclaimer: Do not own Lex Luthor or Chloe Sullivan or Lucas Luthor, In fact I own nothing but the idea for this story and my cat Bob and I am not making any money
Author's Notes: Okay. This just wrote its self. I just typed and this was the result. Would love to know what you think as this is my first ever Chlex fic
Author’s Notes 2: Not sure if this a one shot fic or if I will do a sequel.
Lost
That is how I feel.
I tell myself it is all for the best.
I am kidding myself.
I had been married to Lex for exactly 263 days when the divorce papers arrived.
We met at the torch office; I was the Editor and he the Local Young Billionaire. It wasn’t love at first sight but by the end Highschool I knew I wanted to keep in touch with him. I moved to Metropolis to go to College and he asked me to go for a late supper with him one night and that was that. We bonded over strawberry ice cream.
It all happened so fast; we had only been a couple for 3 months when he asked me to marry him. I was so in love, I couldn’t think of anything I had ever wanted to do more.
We set the date for 6 months later. It was the most amazing time of my life. We had so much fun, getting to know each other properly.
I travelled all over the world just to be near him. I was so in love.
2 days before the wedding I found out I was 8 weeks pregnant, I should have been over the moon, I wasn’t, I should have told Lex then, I didn’t.
I was so scared. I had never wanted children. So I kept it to myself.
Lex knew something was wrong but did not push me, he thought it was nerves.
Slowly I came round to the idea, slowly I adjusted to the idea of being a mother, and slowly dread turned to excitement.
I was 12 weeks gone when I asked Lex to come to the first scan. He looked so stunned; he grabbed me and twirled me round. He was so happy. I was so in love.
They told us it was a little boy. We had so much fun talking about names and where I would have the baby. We spent long evenings just sitting smiling at each other. I was so happy, too happy. I should have known.
I was 14 weeks when the pains started, the most intense pain I had ever felt. I knew. I knew that my little boy was dying and there was nothing I could do about it.
By the time I got to the hospital my little angel was gone. I couldn’t cry. It was my fault for not wanting him. For not loving him from the start.
I watched it happen. I watched myself push Lex away. It was like watching someone else. I wanted to stop doing it but I couldn’t. Slowly the numbness melted away and the pain became unbearable, I spent long days in bed, even longer nights sitting in the garden alone, crying. Lex tried to get through to me, he tried to help me, to tell me it was not my fault. Slowly, I broke him, broke his heart.
We had been married for 3 months when he told me he was leaving. I barely acknowledged him. I was too caught up in my own grief to notice his. Too caught up in my own heartbreak to notice Lex’s.
On our 9 month anniversary I was stunned to receive a call from Lucas. I had cut myself off from everyone, told myself that it was all Lex’s fault. I was so angry at everything. I just couldn’t get a handle on it. I couldn’t control it.
He said he was in town for a couple of weeks and did I want to meet up. I told him to fuck off.
When I first met Lucas we disliked each other, as time wore on he grew on me. He was like the brother I never had. We spent many a night on the phone putting the world in order, deciding how we could make things better. Thankfully it never occurred to Lex to be jealous. He was that sort of guy. He trusted us and I don’t think I ever appreciated just how wonderful Lex was until it was too late.
When Lucas appeared, uninvited, at my door I had not seen him since the wedding. He just looked at me and it was enough. I broke down; he barely had time to catch me before I hit the ground. It felt like I was finally allowing myself to grieve properly.
He stayed with me for 6 days. Just me and him, talking. He told me that I needed to get in touch with Lex; he was in a bad way.
I did get in touch with him. He was so angry with me, told me to leave him alone and stay out of his life, that he never wanted to see me again.
I received the divorce papers 2 days later.
I have made a lot of mistakes; a lot of them stupid and done without thinking. I was not in a place where I could think straight.
I look back and realise that Lex put up with a lot from me. He tried to be there and I just kept on pushing him out, out of my way and out of my life.
I have not given up. I will not give up. I love Lex and I want to try to make things right. I want him to be happy again.
I would like him to be happy with me, but him just being happy would be enough.
The End (for now, possibly)
Chapter/Work in Progress/Complete: ?
Author: Lel
Pairing: Lex/Chloe
Rating: PG-13 (1 use of bad laguage)
Summary: When happiness turns to grief how would you cope?
Content/Warning: AU - Very Angsty.
Spoilers: None
Disclaimer: Do not own Lex Luthor or Chloe Sullivan or Lucas Luthor, In fact I own nothing but the idea for this story and my cat Bob and I am not making any money
Author's Notes: Okay. This just wrote its self. I just typed and this was the result. Would love to know what you think as this is my first ever Chlex fic
Author’s Notes 2: Not sure if this a one shot fic or if I will do a sequel.
Lost
That is how I feel.
I tell myself it is all for the best.
I am kidding myself.
I had been married to Lex for exactly 263 days when the divorce papers arrived.
We met at the torch office; I was the Editor and he the Local Young Billionaire. It wasn’t love at first sight but by the end Highschool I knew I wanted to keep in touch with him. I moved to Metropolis to go to College and he asked me to go for a late supper with him one night and that was that. We bonded over strawberry ice cream.
It all happened so fast; we had only been a couple for 3 months when he asked me to marry him. I was so in love, I couldn’t think of anything I had ever wanted to do more.
We set the date for 6 months later. It was the most amazing time of my life. We had so much fun, getting to know each other properly.
I travelled all over the world just to be near him. I was so in love.
2 days before the wedding I found out I was 8 weeks pregnant, I should have been over the moon, I wasn’t, I should have told Lex then, I didn’t.
I was so scared. I had never wanted children. So I kept it to myself.
Lex knew something was wrong but did not push me, he thought it was nerves.
Slowly I came round to the idea, slowly I adjusted to the idea of being a mother, and slowly dread turned to excitement.
I was 12 weeks gone when I asked Lex to come to the first scan. He looked so stunned; he grabbed me and twirled me round. He was so happy. I was so in love.
They told us it was a little boy. We had so much fun talking about names and where I would have the baby. We spent long evenings just sitting smiling at each other. I was so happy, too happy. I should have known.
I was 14 weeks when the pains started, the most intense pain I had ever felt. I knew. I knew that my little boy was dying and there was nothing I could do about it.
By the time I got to the hospital my little angel was gone. I couldn’t cry. It was my fault for not wanting him. For not loving him from the start.
I watched it happen. I watched myself push Lex away. It was like watching someone else. I wanted to stop doing it but I couldn’t. Slowly the numbness melted away and the pain became unbearable, I spent long days in bed, even longer nights sitting in the garden alone, crying. Lex tried to get through to me, he tried to help me, to tell me it was not my fault. Slowly, I broke him, broke his heart.
We had been married for 3 months when he told me he was leaving. I barely acknowledged him. I was too caught up in my own grief to notice his. Too caught up in my own heartbreak to notice Lex’s.
On our 9 month anniversary I was stunned to receive a call from Lucas. I had cut myself off from everyone, told myself that it was all Lex’s fault. I was so angry at everything. I just couldn’t get a handle on it. I couldn’t control it.
He said he was in town for a couple of weeks and did I want to meet up. I told him to fuck off.
When I first met Lucas we disliked each other, as time wore on he grew on me. He was like the brother I never had. We spent many a night on the phone putting the world in order, deciding how we could make things better. Thankfully it never occurred to Lex to be jealous. He was that sort of guy. He trusted us and I don’t think I ever appreciated just how wonderful Lex was until it was too late.
When Lucas appeared, uninvited, at my door I had not seen him since the wedding. He just looked at me and it was enough. I broke down; he barely had time to catch me before I hit the ground. It felt like I was finally allowing myself to grieve properly.
He stayed with me for 6 days. Just me and him, talking. He told me that I needed to get in touch with Lex; he was in a bad way.
I did get in touch with him. He was so angry with me, told me to leave him alone and stay out of his life, that he never wanted to see me again.
I received the divorce papers 2 days later.
I have made a lot of mistakes; a lot of them stupid and done without thinking. I was not in a place where I could think straight.
I look back and realise that Lex put up with a lot from me. He tried to be there and I just kept on pushing him out, out of my way and out of my life.
I have not given up. I will not give up. I love Lex and I want to try to make things right. I want him to be happy again.
I would like him to be happy with me, but him just being happy would be enough.
The End (for now, possibly)