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View Full Version : [Completed] Choices (NC-17)



sydsvaughn
28th October 2004, 07:01
Title: Choices
Author: SaraC
Rating: NC-17
Spoilers: Future
Summary: A revelation from Clark leads Chloe to think about what and who she really wants

Disclaimer: Not mine, never ever will be. Which is probably good considering I'd do some serious damage to those responsible for mangling the Chlex on the show.

Notes: This is a reworked story I did from another fandom. I just felt the need to try out the 'perspective' and the them from a Chlex standpoint. This is the AU Future and hopefully, it's pretty self explanatory.

Oh and Lady A ... thanks for the support!

~*~*~*~*~*~


I've been in somewhat of a daze the past few days. Seeing Clark again,
realizing he's held onto me in his own way, for the past two years.

Two years.

He told me he’d attended Met U because of me, although he sure could have fooled me with all the attention he paid me during our four years there. Despite the fact he majored in journalism along with me, he only ever played the “friend” card, which was fine by me. It had taken me a while, but despite it all, I’d finally managed to move on from Clark Kent.

With a lot of help, mind you. I couldn’t have done it on my own. Thankfully, I didn’t have to.

So Clark and I graduated, and Clark, for reasons unknown, decided he needed a few months to ‘relax’ after getting his degree. This entailed going back to Smallville, and as I figured it, resolving things once and for all with Lana.

Me, I immediately hit the pavement, and am proud to say, on my own merit (albeit by keeping my entire interview process, amazingly, a secret from everyone) scored a copy-editing job at the Daily Planet. It probably helped that Lois was already working there, despite her claims of not wanting to ever deal with Journalism. She blames me for instilling the bug in her.

I guess I never realized how much my dreams and desires affected those closest to me; even one I didn’t realize was closer than anyone.

So I flourished in my new job, enjoying time with Lois and getting back into the groove of Metropolis.

Of course, it helped to have a friend named Lex.

Never in my wildest dreams did I imagine I would consider Lex Luthor my best friend. In his defense, I don’t think he ever imagined having a spunky, annoying, prone-to-getting-injured-in-his-presence woman as simply a friend, instead of a bed bunny.

Our friendship started during our efforts to bring Lionel down. The way we grew to rely on and trust each other, despite the issues we’d had with each other, our mutual friends, and his father.

When I was forced to play dead for those three months, he was my only contact, the one person I could depend on. His weekly (highly secured) phone calls and the two visits (also shrouded in secrecy) he made during those months were the only things that kept me going.

During those months, I like to think we really became friends. For some reason, I found it easier and easier to open up to the reclusive billionaire. And to my surprise, Lex began to open up to me. To this day, I know things about the man that certain people would kill to get a hold of, including my cousin and former childhood crush.

But I’d never reveal them. Those secrets bind Lex and I, along with several years now of friendship and affection.

There’s more, but I don’t go there. Lex and I established early on that friends were what we would be. It was what the other needed at the time, no romantic attachments, (not to mention our ‘age’ issues) but simply a friend, someone to talk to, more importantly, someone to trust.

Oh, we had our disagreements, still do, and there are times when we won’t speak to each other for weeks. But one of us always caves, and even though apologies are rarely spoken, they are given and received in little actions that need no words.

Over the years, though college and the two ensuing years, that friendship grew and strengthened, despite the twinge I’d feel every time I saw a picture of him with the latest brunette bimbo he was dating. We’d developed a habit of teasing each other about our preferences, since I too was not lacking in dates, not that I really felt ready for a relationship.

I’ve always known, deep down, the reason for that. But I don’t want to admit it, simply because of the changes it will bring. I’m not ready for that yet. I can’t be, if ever. It’s just too dangerous, too impossible, and too improbable.

Although it doesn’t stop me from wanting it desperately.

But I’ve managed to keep my feelings hidden, desperate to not change the only relationship that’s stable in my life. Since my dad died two years ago, Lex has been my anchor, and the thought of losing him, losing the closeness that’s unique to the two of us, it’s unbearable.

Even if I find myself wondering if the risk would be worth it.

These thoughts plague me still, which was why today’s sudden visit from Clark has me so reflective and shaken.

We haven’t talked much since I accepted a position at the Inquisitor a year and a half ago, and he got into the Daily Planet. (Apparently Perry White did remember him, and decided to take a chance on him) We were friendly, but he was so busy and involved with his work, and Lois, that conversations were few but friendly.

It also didn’t help that I was so close with Lex, while he rarely spoke to his former friend. It’s a rift I know more about than Clark will ever know, and I intend to keep it that way. Lex’s confidences are ones I’ll never break, especially when I fully understand and support why he did what he did.

So, I’ve hardly seen Clark and never really thought much about him in the ensuing years, other than a friend from high school and the current bane of my cousin’s existence.

Until he showed up on my doorstep a few hours ago, claiming that he needed to talk to me urgently.

I honestly never expected him to admit that he’d been in love with me for years, had followed me to Met U and stayed in Metropolis to be near me. He’d certainly never made an effort to intimate anything other than friendship, and even that was always interrupted by his ‘frequent emergencies’ that he thought no one had figured out.

It was at this time I trotted out his obsession with Lana, but he insisted that he was over her, had realized that I was more important to him that Lana.

Again, he could have fooled me, what with all the trips back to Smallville, where a very single Lana Lang resided.

Bringing this up, along with the fact he’d waited two years to figure out what he felt, he countered with his standard argument “because he couldn’t bear to hurt me by starting something he couldn’t finish because of ‘issues’ that he couldn’t share.

I wanted to tell him that he was not very good at ‘disguise’, and that Lex and I had figured out his secret years ago, but kept silent. I knew he would never reveal his alter-ego, at least, not to someone he didn’t love.

He spent the next hour explaining that he’d finally accepted who he was, and that he needed me in his life to complete it. He was ready to put me first, to make a commitment and to take our friendship to something more.

Needless to say, I was stunned. This was completely out of the blue and unexpected. For a moment, listening to him, reading the sincerity in his eyes, I was tempted. Thoughts, feelings, emotions I’d held for him for so long during my early years came back to the surface, surprising me with their intensity.

I suppose it was part of my need for love, for what I craved from someone else, but was too afraid to ask because of the price.

For a moment, I wondered if it would be possible to make a life with Clark, despite the secret he refused to tell.

The moment quickly passed as I realized that Clark would never be honest with me and that was one thing I could not live with.

Lex might do some unethical things, things that aren’t deliberately meant to hurt, but definitely meant to wound. He tells me about them, doesn’t keep them from me. He needs to talk to me about them, because they do bother him.

He worries constantly about becoming his father, and I am the only one who can provide the reassurance that he’s not. I will tell him if I totally disapprove of his actions, but being much older and wiser in the ways of the world, business and otherwise, I most often understand what others, especially Clark, even my cousin might not.

If that makes me a bad person, I’m sorry. I can’t help what I feel and believe, and in all that, Lex will always come first.

As Clark rambled on, I found myself imagining how I would feel if it were Lex speaking to me of his feelings, his emotions. The idea sent a shiver down my spine as for one moment; I allowed those hidden thoughts to surface, to enjoy the possibility of loving and being loved by Lex Luthor.

Clark’s grabbing (because there was no finesse about it) of my hand broke me from those thoughts, and I realized he was waiting for an answer.

I tried to be as gentle as possible, explaining that I just didn’t think of him that way, not that he’d ever given me reason to in the past years.

He tried to explain, but every word felt weak. Despite the fact he seemed blind to what his words revealed, I could see clearly that this was never about love for me, only about a need to be accepted, to reclaim a piece of his life that had been more innocent and free.

Gently, I tried to explain this, but it was obviously not received well. There was yelling, more so on his part than mine, the requisite mentions of Lana, his belief I was still jealous of her and the insane idea that I was jealous of Lois’ position at the Planet.

I had to laugh at that, choosing not to reveal that Lana Lang was one of the few people I could happily never see again in my life and that Lois and I had come to an understanding years ago, when I’d chosen the Inquisitor and she the Planet. However, my words to him on the fact that neither Lana nor Lois had any impact on me now went into deaf ears.

I shouldn’t have been surprised, even his declaration of love for me must somehow relate back to Lois and in the end, Lana. That was how it was with Clark Kent, always obsessing over the “LL’s” in his life.

Of course that lead to the third “LL” … Lex Luthor. Clark ranted that Lex had corrupted me, turned me against him and my friends.

That’s when I got angry. I made it quite clear, in very simple terms so he could understand, that Lex and I were friends and it was a friendship that I would not trade for anything in the world. He blustered, intimating that Lex had a hold over me, in a less than ‘friendship’ way, and despite the leap my heart took at the thought, I managed to control the urge to smack him.

It didn’t help that I knew it wouldn’t hurt him.

The yelling continued for a while, neither of us willing to give an inch. Part of me hated doing this, realizing that despite everything, he really believed he loved me, even though I knew he didn’t. I didn’t want to lose the friendship we had, what little it had become, but I saw now that was inevitable.

Probably had been the day I realized that Lex was the one who would be there for me, instead of the farm boy I’d imagined my entire childhood.

Finally, Clark had wound down, calming as he ran out of arguments. My relief was short lived when after turning down his final plea, he bitterly rose and stormed out.

But not without parting words, ending our friendship and branding me Lex Luthor’s whore.

It hurt, I’ll admit, especially after all the declarations of love he’d spent the past hour giving. However, the pain was lessened by the knowledge that he only thought he loved me, when instead he loved the idea of me, of what he thought a life with me would be like.

It only went to show me that he didn’t know me at all.

Only one man knew me, and while I’d been denying it for years, tonight’s visit had stripped away the covering I’d put on it all those years ago.

My father always said things happen for a reason and that life works in mysterious ways. Maybe Clark’s visit was the reminder that my life wasn’t exactly complete, that things weren’t as neat and orderly as I’d believed.

My thoughts on Lex and our relationship were certainly in turmoil. Years of denying myself the idea of anything more than friendship were faltering, thanks in part to the declarations of a farm boy. Realizing that I couldn’t love Clark, because I’d long ago given myself completely to Lex.

Which now has me questioning all the choices I’ve made over the past few years. Most importantly, did I make the right one in keeping Lex a friend instead of possibly something more?

I ponder that as I find myself relaxing back into Lex’s leather sofa. I came here as soon as Clark left, needing, if nothing more, my best friend to run all this by. Knowing Lex, he knows by now that Clark visited me—and I want to be the one to tell him why. Even though I’m not sure how he’s going to take it—or even what I’m going to say.

My mind is a twisted maze, trying to figure out what I believe, who I am, what I want and where I’m going. I can't deny it, seeing Clark, hearing what he had to say, analyzing my own feelings, I wonder about my choice to keep Lex in my life.

God knows it hasn't been easy. In fact, at times, I've wondered why the hell I'm friends with someone so capable of becoming a man as evil and twisted as his father.

But he does not want to be his father, and he knows I know that. I’m the only one standing between him and that fine line, and we both know it. I know the risks of being his friend, his confidant, of being the one constant in his increasingly darkening life.

Yet still I stay.

Is that by choice? Or by fate? Would I be happier, more fulfilled, if I chose a life with Clark, despite knowing who and what he is, despite the secrets that would remain between us?

I sigh, still confused as I hear the key turn in the lock and tilt my head to see Lex walking into the room, his eyes going immediately to mine.

He doesn’t say a word, simply drops his briefcase onto the table and walks over to sit next to me. I lean a little closer, so our
shoulders touch, feeling the familiar security I only have when I’m with Lex. The warmth of his body flows into mine, and in some strange way, his presence is comforting to my jumbled emotions.

For a few moments, we say nothing. I know Lex is waiting for me to speak, waiting for me to spill everything, knowing I need to. Probably knowing me better than I know myself. Just like I know him better than he knows himself.

Somewhere along the way, along this journey, it just happened. We got to know each other too well. It's never been like that with anyone. I don't know if I like that.

But it's the truth, no matter how hard I try to deny it.

So I tell Lex everything, just like he, and I, knew I would. I tell him about everything except my changing feelings for him, and for our friendship that I’m beginning to wish was more.

I even tell him about my thoughts and doubts on the life I've chosen, although I leave all aspects relating to our friendship out of the revelations.

I tell him all this, and he sits and listens quietly, letting me talk, letting me ramble, knowing I need to get this out. I can tell he's surprised at times, and underneath it all, a little bit hurt that I never told him about my conflicting feelings for Clark and the years in Smallville I haven’t thought about in ages.

And part of me hurts to see him hurt. It always does. It always has.

Finally, I finish, reaching for the water bottle I’ve helped myself to before he arrived, taking a long sip, wondering what he's going to say.

Still he remains silent.

"Lex," I say, turning to look at him, "say something."

There's a long moment before he speaks.

"I just find it hard to believe."

"What part?"

"Everything, most notably Clark’s sudden desire to reveal all to you—except for his biggest secret—and your thoughts, even for a moment, on considering him."

I’m not sure what to say, realizing he has a point, is asking questions I myself have spent the past few hours analyzing and trying to answer.

I'm silent for a moment, considering what I'm going to say, noting he is waiting, although a bit impatiently, from his clenched right fist.

"Yes, I considered spending my life with Clark, what it would have been like,” I begin, stopping as he interrupts before I can continue.

"How many different lives would we be leading if we made different choices?"

His words surprise me, and I have to think about them for a moment. I know he, like me, is wondering what kind of life he might be living if I hadn’t helped him take down Lionel, if I hadn’t been his voice of reason, his friend through it all.

It's a tough question for both of us to answer, but I owe it to both of us to try.

"What if there was only one choice," I begin, talking this out as I go, not quite sure where I'm going yet. "And there were signs along the way that neither of us paid much attention to."

Lex is silent again, and I turn to look at him, wondering what he's
thinking, what he's feeling.

"Choices that would then lead to this very moment," he begins, "we wouldn't be sitting here together, and that says a lot."

I'm hearing his words, and I'm understanding them in my own way. The choices we've made have led us to this point, to the point where we're sitting on his couch, discussing the choices themselves. If I hadn't chosen to do that Torch interview years ago, beginning our first ever bout of verbal judo, we wouldn't be here right now. If he hadn’t opened up to me, allowed me to see the little boy inside the man, if I hadn’t trusted him with my life, my confidence, my love, even that of just a friend, we'd never have come as far as we have. Never have come to this point in time in our lives.

And as I realize that, I suddenly realize that there is no other place I'd rather be.

Sure, I'm going to think about the life I could have had as the wife of a superhero. It’s human nature. But this is the life I'm leading. By my choice. I knew, clear as day, the path I set on with Lex wouldn't be easy. It would be the scariest, most challenging, most thrilling ride of my life.

But despite all we’ve faced, what we’ve gone through, we've come through it. Come through it together. Come through it to this point in time, right here, where we can sit next to each other, and talk about our choices. Drawing comfort from each other's strengths and weaknesses. Knowing each other better than we've ever known anyone else.

For I have no doubt, I know Lex better than any man I've ever met, Clark included. And I know he knows me better than anyone else ever has in my life. It's a comforting thought in many ways, a scary thought in others.

Lex and I are on this path together, by our choices. Together, searching for the truth and meaning in our lives and with each other.

And truthfully, all things aside, there's no place else I'd rather be. No place I'd feel as safe, and as comfortable, as right here, right now, leaning on Lex's shoulder, listening to his voice, knowing he's with me, knowing he understands me. Even if I don't yet truly understand myself.

And on that note, I feel myself drifting off, sleep finally claiming me as I snuggle against Lex, knowing he'll watch over me, keep me safe, take care of me, love me in his own strange way.

For now, I can forget all things and simply sleep.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Several hours later, something awakens me. I slowly find myself becoming aware of my surroundings, a strange sense of peace filling me as I stare into the soft familiar light of the fire in Lex’s living room. I sit up slowly, realizing I'm lying on the couch, a blanket tucked snugly around me. I struggle to a sitting position, wondering how long I've been asleep, wondering where Lex is. Stretching a bit, I manage to stand, feeling my bare feet hit the softly carpeted floor.

Bare feet?

I look down, and notice my stockings have been removed, as has my jacket. I blush as I realize it must have been Lex who took them off. I
suddenly picture his hands, slipping up my legs, and under my skirt-touching my bare skin as he peels the stockings down my legs-

I shake my head, knowing the weekend's events have put me on an emotional roller coaster. It's only natural I'd be thinking like this. Especially after the deep conversation we’d had. I sigh as I move slowly towards Lex’s bedroom, telling myself I'm simply going to use the bathroom to freshen up, then head home.

I deliberately tell myself to avoid looking over at the bed as
I enter the room, but a soft sound from Lex draws my attention to his prone form.

He's dead to the world. His body is stretched out, one long leg sticking out endearingly from under the covers.

One long, bare leg, along with a bare chest I can see since the sheet is wrapped low around his waist. His skin is pale white and even at this distance, seems smooth and hairless.

He looks so innocent. So untouched. So childlike when he sleeps.

Before I know what I'm doing, I find myself moving towards the bed, coming to a stop directly in front of him, so close I can feel his soft breath blowing across my stomach. I shiver as I battle the urge to leave, and instead, brush my fingers over the crown of his scalp, giving into a desire I’ve hidden away for far too long.

I catch my breath as I feel him turn his cheek into my palm, brushing against the soft skin, leaning into my caress in his sleep. I feel my heart leap at the move, holding my breath in hopes he doesn't wake up. But I'm fascinated with watching him now, seeing how vulnerable he is in his sleep.

And I find myself thinking about the choices I've made, we've made, that have led us to this point.

I stand there for a long time, thinking of how much I love the man in front of me. I might not want to admit it, but the truth is, I do. I love him more than I ever loved Clark. Even though loving Lex is about the worst thing I could do at this point in our lives, I know, deep inside, it's the right thing.

It's the choice I made long ago, when I decided to follow him on this path. The choice I made to find my own answers, as well as help him find his. It's a truth I've been fighting for a long time, but only recently realized.

Seeing Clark, thinking of my past, only served to cement the future I realize is my destiny. My choice. My free will.

It scares me to death. But it excites me as well.

I look at Lex for another moment before removing my hand, smiling slightly at the soft sound of disappointment I can hear as he settles back into sleep. Taking a deep breath, I move over to the chair by the window, and pull my shirt over my head. With another quick move, my skirt is off, leaving me in nothing but my bra and panties. I turn to stare at Lex’s naked back again, wondering if he has anything on beneath the sheet.

I smile as I realize I am going to find out.

With another quick move, my bra and panties are gone and I stand there, naked, gazing at Lex’s sleeping figure. Without another thought, I move over and slip into the bed with him, pulling the covers over my body. He moves slightly as my weight shifts the mattress, and I hold still a
moment, hoping he won't wake up. He doesn't. Breathing quietly, I move closer, feeling his warmth as I press myself against his back, feeling my breasts flatten against his warm body as I entwine my legs around his. I manage to throw one arm over his chest, feeling him move back against me. I rest my head against his back, settling down, realizing for the first time, I feel totally at peace, totally safe.

I don't want to think of what I'm doing, of what the morning will bring, of what the future will bring. I just know I love this man, and there's no place I'd rather be at this very moment, than in this bed, with him.

As I let myself relax, wrapped around Lex, I have a vague recollection
of him settling me on the couch, of a soft touch on my face as he leans over me. I find myself drifting off to sleep imagining what it would be like if he would have kissed me.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Sometime later I'm awakened by an incredible sensation of warmth. I slowly let my eyes drift open, to see Lex’s head settled against my breasts, his face burrowed against my body, his hot breath abrading my nipples. I move slightly, trying to ease the ache his breathing is causing, only to feel another ache hit my body as the move pushes a nipple against his lips. I have to hold back a moan as I feel Lex instinctively react, mouth opening and drawing my flesh into the warmth of his mouth.

I arch myself against him, hoping he won't wake up just yet, that he won't stop what he's doing. I shudder as I feel one of his free hands, which has somehow ended up wrapped around my waist, slide lower, skimming over my skin with a light, feathery touch. I can't hold back a moan this time and I sense, even in the half asleep state we're both in, he's aware of this too. I find myself arching against his mouth, moaning softly as I feel his fingers slip between my thighs, to find me warm and willing.

Ready for him.

With a small gasp, I feel two fingers slip deep inside me and I can't stop my inner muscles from clenching around him. I whimper as I feel his fingers increase their pace, as his suckling on my breast becomes harder. I'm fast loosing it now, lost in a world of exquisite sensation, a world I've been waiting to find, knowing, somewhere, I'd only be able to find it with Lex.

Suddenly, I feel his fingers stop, and his mouth move away from my breast. I moan at the loss, opening my eyes to meet the dark blue depths of his.

For a moment, we stare at each other, neither breathing, letting our eyes communicate all we haven't said. His gaze burns into mine and I can see the passion, the desire, and yes, the love, shining in them.

"Chloe-are you sure-" is all he manages to get out before I stop him by bringing my hands to his head and pulling his mouth down to mine.

And I finally, truly kiss my best friend, Lex Luthor.

I feel him shudder as my tongue probes against his lips, begging for entrance. With a small moan, he opens his mouth and I dive in.

The kiss becomes passionate and hotter than anything I've ever known, in a matter of seconds. His mouth is devouring mine, while his fingers, which have never left my body, suddenly resume their stroking. I arch hard against him, moaning as I feel him break our kiss and move his lips across my throat, and down to my breasts again.

I move against his fingers, my hands slipping down to cup him. I moan at the feel of his hard cock, pulsing against me as I stroke him gently from base to tip. I hear his moan as he arches up, his cock growing harder with each stroke.

My breathing is frantic now, as my body nears the edge. I sense he's close too, and know this first time, he needs to be inside me, I need him inside me when we both go over the edge.

Pulling back, I move my body so my center is rubbing directly against his cock. I hear his moan as he moves over me, positioning so I can feel the tip of him against my moist center.

Neither of us speak, our eyes communicate all we need to know.

He loves me.

I love him.

This is a choice we're both making. And I know it's the right one. That's the one thing I'm sure of at this moment. More sure than I've ever been of anything in my life.

I let my eyes convey that thought to him, and I see an answering flash as he thrusts deep and hard into me.

I cry out at the feeling of him, so hard and big, buried deep inside of me. It feels so right. It feels like it's always been right. It feels like I've come home.

I sense Lex feels the same as his eyes lock on mine and he begins to move. I arch up against him, matching him move for move, letting my soft moans and my eyes convey the wildness I can feel coming over me. Lex must sense it too, as he speeds up his motions, breath blowing hot against my face as our gazes remain locked.

I can feel myself nearing the edge, can feel Lex right there with me. And as we gaze into each other's eyes, I make the final choice, take the final step, the step my entire life has been leading me to.

I clench my inner muscles around him, and as he thrusts deep, let myself fly. I cry out his name as I go over the edge, feeling his own body tense, then release deep inside me. I hear the hoarse cry of my name mix with the echo of my cry as we let our bodies fly.

It's like nothing I've ever felt before. Or ever will again.

I'm finally free.

I'm finally where I belong.

And I can't figure out why it's taken me so long, so many doubts, to reach this place. I continue to ponder those thoughts as I let my body slowly come back to earth, feeling Lex's breathing and heart rate slowly return to normal.

After a few moments, he rolls off of me, pulling me against him, settling our bodies so that we're pressed tightly together, skin against skin. Neither of us say anything, he just holds me and strokes my hair softly.

His voice in the stillness startles me.

"Chloe-no matter what choices I've made in my life, the one choice I've never regretted, the one choice I know I was destined to make, the one choice I knew would change my life-was you.”

I’m not sure if I can breath, feeling an onslaught of emotions welling inside me, tears of joy threatening to spill over as he continues.

“I chose this path for myself, and you, for some reason, decided to come down it with me. At great risk to yourself, against everything you believed in at times. You chose me, and I'll be thankful for that every day of my life.”

I’m unashamedly crying now, the tears unable to be contained as I hear the sincerity in his voice, read it in his eyes.

“I couldn't have made it without you. You are my touchstone, my one truth, and you always will be. You're the best choice I ever made, even though I don't know how I got so lucky as to have you chose me."

I smiled into his eyes, knowing how hard it had been for him to say that, to admit to choosing, to needing me.

Could I love this man any more?

I snuggle closer to him as I whisper my reply.

"I know that, Lex. And despite all my fears, my insecurities, my worries, I chose you, of my own free will. We’ve had our ups and downs, our triumphs and disasters.”

I pause, feeling him shudder against me, pulling me closer, wrapping me securely in his arms. Snuggling in, I continue.

“We’ve both lost so much, but through it all, we've never lost each other. We might have been distant, but we've never given up.”

I raise my hands, making sure his eyes are staring straight into mine as I finish.

“I might think about the life I might have had, the life you might have had, if we'd never met. But our choices lead us to our future, and I made a choice a long time ago, without even realizing it. I've chosen the future I'm meant to lead, and call it fate, or dumb luck, my path, my future, is with you. It always will be.”

The tears are flowing again as I finish, and I can see the answering emotion in Lex’s eyes as he listens and understands what I’ve just admitted, what I’ve just vowed.

He pulls me closer, and we’re both silent for a few moments, simply absorbing each other, and the revelations we've just made. I snuggle even closer to him as I feel sleep and contentment slowly start to creep over me. As I drift off to sleep, the last words I hear are whispered across my ear.

"I love you, Chloe."

I smile against his chest.

"I love you too, Lex."

And with that, I let sleep overtake me, safe and secure in my best friend, now my lover’s arms.

I might not have always been sure of the choices I've made, and I've often made wrong ones. We both have.

But the most important choice of my life, the only one that means anything, is lying right here in my arms.

For once, I have no doubts at all.

I've finally chosen right.

~*~*~*~*~~*~*~

The End

(Yes, I'm working on more "Divine Madness" ... but Comps, papers and screenplays are crowding out the muse at the moment, and the necessity!)

Janet
28th October 2004, 07:18
*represses a squeal*

*calms down*





Ok.... wow. Great job! Loved Chloe finding her choices leading to Lex - giving her the chance to turn Clark away, niiiice......

Getting into bed with Lex was a wonderful choice! I would've done the same... :blinkkiss:

Bravo.

kitten
28th October 2004, 07:20
:wub:

This is an amazingly sweet, realistic story. I loved it, especially the way they both realize they've been moving toward being a couple for years. Lovely plotted smut. :biggrin:

eurydices falling
28th October 2004, 08:20
Sara this was wonderful. I love how flawless your 1st voice was.

Brava. Take a bow. :worship2:

Béatrice
28th October 2004, 08:23
A big WOW!!! That is so beautiful I can't find words to describe what I feel. BRAVO!!! :clap:

estrellalily
28th October 2004, 09:05
that was great!! i know exactly how chloe felt with clark, and why she had to say no to him, and therefore why it was so hard. this story was really moving. thank you very much :wub:

:blinkkiss:
~estrellalily

hateSmallvilleLoveChlex
28th October 2004, 10:19
This was so...Just... :worship2: :worship2: :worship2: :worship2:
I love it! Would you mind if I copied it to my computer?

lexchloe
28th October 2004, 10:50
:worship2: :worship2: :wub: :biggrin: .............excellent

Lady Aquitaine
28th October 2004, 11:54
I am so glad you posted the story! :biggrin: I totally LOVED it! Lex and Chloe (especially Chloe) were perfect.

This story is definitely going into my "Favorite" collection... :worship2: :worship2:

Lady A

ruafair
28th October 2004, 13:58
Oh wow Sara that was excellent...... Chloe was spot on in this....

Brilliant...

Fiona

hfce
28th October 2004, 16:03
Aww that was so beautiful. I loved it.


Hope :wub:

chril1
28th October 2004, 18:05
c'etait beau!!! Je l'adore!!!

love lea
xxx

zabu
28th October 2004, 18:21
That' s was so sweet, I love it goog job. :chlexsign2:

autumngold
28th October 2004, 18:43
This story is perfect!! I love how Chloe realizes that Clark is just using his love for her to hold onto the past, but that Lex is allowing his love for Chloe to keep her safe and that he's letting her take her time and choose her own future!! Thank you so much for writing this wonderful story!! I love it!! :wub: :chlexsign4: :wub:

Blaire023
28th October 2004, 19:11
lovely

and i absolutely adore any fic that refers to the male anatomy as a 'cock'.

love it

kirt30
28th October 2004, 19:31
loved it hope you do a sequal to it

MissMed03
28th October 2004, 19:32
AWESOME!

campbti
28th October 2004, 22:42
That was so amazing. Loved every little bit of it. Keep up the great work. More on divine madness when you can, and good luck with all your projects.

:chlexsign2:

lexodus
28th October 2004, 22:49
Wow. :worship2:

newbatgirl
28th October 2004, 23:48
Beautiful. Just perfect.

S.Ann Smith
29th October 2004, 01:21
*sigh*

beautiful

:wub:

sylvia
29th October 2004, 15:15
I really like the way you wrote Chloe and Lex's revelations in this one. Wonderful job.

buddyfozzy
29th October 2004, 23:38
This was so beautiful. Is there a sequel coming? :chlexsign4:

je_m'adore
30th October 2004, 07:43
That was beautiful.

I'm crying.

StephLuva
1st November 2004, 01:51
lOVED IT!!! The only problem is the repetitiveness of Chloe choosing the path that she's taking over and over again

but besides that it was DOPE!!!!!!! :chlexsign1: :yay:

Ainur
23rd January 2005, 07:21
This was perfect and so insightful. Loved it really. Great job!

Sidhe
25th February 2005, 09:24
That was so moving! I actually have tears in my eyes. :worship2:

Christy January
1st March 2005, 05:58
WOW. That's all I got. :ohmy:

:chlexsign3:

starmoon
17th March 2005, 23:13
I enjoyed this story very much.

meghan036
12th April 2005, 02:40
so sweet and beautiful! loved it.

junked_helix
1st May 2005, 13:40
Wow! I want to cry.....tis good

seraphic
3rd May 2005, 21:18
OMG! That was such a beautiful piece. Simply stunning!

arkakitty
22nd June 2005, 14:02
Amazing, It is sooo touching *sniff*

ggdoll18
5th July 2005, 06:22
awesome!!!!!

darkangel
5th July 2005, 06:31
I just lived this fic.

jaxie926
5th July 2005, 07:09
This was one of the first pieces I read when I first came to n-s. When I was lurking about reading and not commenting, b/c I wasn't sure what to say. I stumbled across it tonight in the "new posts" and read it again, so I thought I'd leave some f/b this time.

I really enjoyed reading from Chloe's pov in this one. Excellent story. I loved it the first time, and still love it now.

*scurries off to read more things you've written*

darkangel
6th July 2005, 01:45
This was a very good fic.

chexfan
1st September 2005, 10:50
It's made all the more sweeter by the touches of angst. Nicely done.

Ann
2nd September 2005, 05:11
This was absolutely beautiful! I loved it. :)

pipersmum
3rd September 2005, 01:09
Really enjoyed this story it was just perfect, so i read it twice :coolbaby:

~*~Tasha~*~
3rd June 2006, 17:04
Wow, this was an amazing fic. It was poignant, reflective, heart wrenching, romantic, and very satisfying all around. You made this story complete with so many different elements coming together. This was truly a beautiful fic.

Linda
17th February 2008, 10:28
What a beautifully told story. This is how it should be.Many thanks.

juuicebox
19th February 2008, 05:19
beautiful. just beautiful.

Emch
20th February 2008, 19:47
I love it.

Excellent, great, brilliant....

I don't know what else can I say.

Tanschana
18th May 2008, 09:25
Awwwww
wow
Loved it!

dkangel1
18th May 2008, 23:22
This was simply wonderful. I think this maybe one of my favs ever. It was so beautifully written.

Thank you.

Ami Rose
30th August 2012, 08:17
Very sweet loved it

Dolly
30th August 2012, 08:47
I'm normally not a fan of the first person but you drew me right in. Such a loveless story. Thank you.