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lexchloe
18th October 2004, 23:45
Title: Brainstorming

Author: Lexchloe

Summary: this is a little piece that I’ve written after reading the spoilers for the upcoming episode ‘Scare’, so be warned, that this will contain information about this episode. I have no idea how the writers of Smallville comes up with ideas for episodes, but in my story they have ‘brain-storming’ sessions to discuss ideas with Al Gough and Miles Miller before writing the episode. Therein lays the setting. I put this in humour even though I’m not really funny so please don’t throw tomatoes at my lack of funny.

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters of Smallville; if I did Lex would be permanently chained to my bed!!!) the representations of the people mentioned here are not accurate and are just a product of my imagination

Rating: PG13-R (to be safe)




Characters;

Newbie: (recent addition to the Smallville writing staff)
Al Gough
Miles Miller
Former newbie. (Been working on the team for a few months now)

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(Setting: the Smallville writing team and Al Gough and Miles Miller are in the brain-storming room discussing ideas for upcoming episodes of Smallville.)

Al Gough: "Ok we have this exciting new episode coming up that will deal with the biggest fears of various cast members.”

Newbie: (speaks before thinking) “Hey didn’t Buffy do an episode about that exact same thing in season 4???”

Miles Miller: (eyes widen comically before he replies in a panicked voice) what are you suggesting? Are you working for Joss (Whedon), because we came up with this idea all on our own!!!”

Newbie: “I didn’t mean anything by it. Sorry.”

Al Gough: (nods forgivingly before looking around the room) “So any ideas on what we should focus on?”

(Silence around the room)

Newbie: (bravely speaks up and tries not to be distracted by the giant poster of KK which is situated on the wall behind Al and Miles Miller) “I was thinking we could play on Lex’s fear of rejection and never being loved. He could say have a hallucination where he sees his mother and she tells him that he can never be loved and that he’s just like his father, or we could substitute her with say Helen, Clark or the Kent’s.”

Al Gough: (nods thoughtfully) “Right, right. That’s good. Do you want to know what would make it even better? A wedding scene, with Lana as the bride telling him that she can never love him.”

Newbie: (confused) “How does that make it better?”

Al Gough: (looks at newbie like he’s stupid) “Well firstly Kristin wears a wedding dress!” (Turns to Miles Miller before continuing) She would look great in one of those.

Miles Miller: (nods eagerly and finishes Al’s thought) “And secondly Lex is in love with Lana.”

Newbie: (slightly bewildered) “Why?”

Al Gough: (snaps because newbie is interrupting his daydream about KK in a wedding dress) “Why what?”

Newbie: “Why would Lex be in love with Lana?

Al Gough: (can’t believe that newbie is even asking) “Well because she’s Lana. She’s everything beautiful, perfect, innocent, pure and good.”

Newbie: “But that doesn’t make any sense”

Al Gough: (looking confused) “What do you mean sense?”

Newbie: “Well if Lex has to be in love with anyone, wouldn’t Chloe be the more logical choice?”

Al Gough: “Chloe?”

Miles Miller: (whispers to Al) “I think he means the blonde one.”

Al Gough: (nods in comprehension) “Oh her. I don’t get it why would he want her when there’s Lana?”

Newbie: “Well let’s see they have a lot in common. They’re both smarter than their friends and both have a thirst for knowledge. They were both raised by their fathers and grew up without a mother figure. They both crave love and acceptance. They both put on a front to the outside world and hide their true feelings. They both need some form of affirmation from Clark Kent. Even though she needed his help to get out of tricky situation last season he’s always treated her as an equal of sorts and she’s the only one we’ve seen so far who’s put her complete trust in him and had faith in his abilities. Plus he was hiding her for three months. It’s not a far stretch to imagine that some kind of relationship developed between them. Besides Lex has had nothing but bad luck with brunettes so you’d think that being as smart as he is he would try a blonde out for size.”

Al Gough: (who has been listening intently and nodding throughout) Hmm, yeah, yeah ok and how would Lana factor into this?”

Newbie: “Uhhhh, she wouldn’t.”

Miles Miller: (almost chokes on his coffee at this) “Ok you’re new here so you obviously don’t know how we do things around here. Lana is what makes the show work. Without Lana what would we have? An hour long show about how some alien develops into one of the most recognised superhero’s of all time and his relationship with his conflicted best friend and how they ultimately become each other’s greatest enemies? I mean who wants to watch that? Lana is what keeps us here and unless she factors in somehow we have nothing!!!!!! NOTHING!!!!!” (Miles Miller has at this point gotten very worked up)

Al Gough: (tries to calm down a very heated Miles Miller whilst shooting dirty looks at newbie for getting him agitated.) “So it’s agreed, the wedding sequence is in and Lex is in love with Lana?”

(The rest of the writing team nod in agreement, not wanting to get either Al or Miles Miller mad)

Newbie: (ventures bravely despite the warning looks he’s getting from the others) “What about Chloe?”

Al Gough: “Who?”

Newbie: (sighs) “The blonde one”

Miles Miller: (who’s calmed down now) “What about her.”

Newbie: “Well if you won’t let her interact with Lex then how about an alternative storyline. Lots of fans have expressed interest in finding out more about her mother. Maybe we can bring her in and link her with say Lionel maybe. That could be interesting.”

Al Gough: “I like it, I like it but here’s an even more interesting idea as part of the ‘Scare’ we find out that Chloe’s mum, is crazy and it’s hereditary. Then in later episodes when Chloe goes nuts and tries to kill everyone Lana and her super cool tattoo come to the rescue and save everyone.

Miles Miller: (beams joyfully and starts clapping enthusiastically) “Genius pure genius!!!!”

Al Gough: (looks smug) “It is though isn’t it?”

Newbie: (shakes his head in disbelief) But there’s never been any indication that Chloe’s mum was crazy. From what we’ve seen so far she walked out on her family. Don’t you guys care about continuity?”

Miles Miller: (looking puzzled) “Contiwhat????”

Newbie: (tries to say something but can’t find the words) …………..

Al Gough: “Welllll, I guess we’re done. You guys get to writing and we’ll go talk to Kristin about wedding dresses.” (Both Miles Miller and Gough leave the room, in a hurry)

(The writing team start to make their way out of the room and to the locker room to shower off the effects of the meeting)

Newbie: (walks along with them, completely stunned by what’s just gone on) “It’s like they can’t hear a word you say!!!”

Former newbie: “You’ll learn to deal with it, be prepared to drink lots and lots of alcohol. Welcome to Lanaville, once you visit you might never be able to leave.

Former newbie leaves newbie standing there wondering if it’ not too late to take that job on Days of our Lives.

The end.

LaLa
19th October 2004, 00:04
:worship2: OOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

I can't stop laughing! :ohmy: U killed me there! i was totally floored! This is what I call 'funny'! we should send that to the Production of Lanaville! :devil: serves them right to ba that idiotic!

xoxo LaLa - u're my hero for the night! ...even if I'm little sad for the newbie, poor guy!

asharnanae
19th October 2004, 00:45
:biggrin: OMG!!!! ahahahahahaahahahahahah!! Now thats so very funny because I can actually se it happening! *snigger* though I do feel sorry for the newbee.

hfce
19th October 2004, 00:58
:lol: that was funny yet sad at the same time.


Hope :chlexsign3:

Susan S
19th October 2004, 01:50
You that would definitely explain a lot about the show. I wonder if it would do any good to send a copy to the writers?


Susan S

campbti
19th October 2004, 05:41
Who are you kidding, that was funny stuff. More so, because it is probably so very close to true. I mean chloe is popular enough to have the chloe chronicles on aol centered around her. Sad part is that this is the way that Smallville is going and I think they really do only see Lana, funny since in the grand scheme she becomes the girl who gets left behind in Smallville, so no she isn't the girl who goes to, well anywhere. LOL. (somehow it makes me feel better).

GREAT work....

:chlexsign2:

autumngold
19th October 2004, 07:38
Originally posted by Susan S@Oct 19 2004, 01:50 AM
You that would definitely explain a lot about the show. I wonder if it would do any good to send a copy to the writers?


Susan S
Very funny story!! I really wish that the writers of Smallville could get a clue!! Thanks for the great read!! :biggrin: :chlexsign1: :biggrin:

xevaral
19th October 2004, 08:05
Hehehehe! You should send this to Miles and Gough! They probably wouldn't get it.

kezz
19th October 2004, 10:29
You think they would get offended if we sent this into them to show them what we think of their god awful writing?

Seriously I'm gonna stop watching Smallville altogether if it carries on down this path and I don't think I'll be the only one either.

Kezz....x.x.x.

sylvia
19th October 2004, 15:56
SHEER BRILLIANCE.

Mind if I quote you on... the entire thing?

And yeah, if only AlMiles could see this. And understand it.

kitten
19th October 2004, 18:35
Mean, but wonderfully funny. Great! (Probably accurate, too!)

Béatrice
19th October 2004, 19:57
:lol: Verrrrryyy Funnnny!!!

Aww Poor Newbie. Nobody understands him (except Chlexers...)

carebear72884
19th October 2004, 20:13
:pclol: :pclol: :pclol: :pclol: :pclol:
LOL this is way way to funny...you really should send it to AlMiles, I don't care if they are offended...they need to see how we feel.

Impress
20th October 2004, 06:45
LOL. it's so funny and so sad and so true.

Kit Merlot
20th October 2004, 17:57
You have no idea how this fic made me laugh, but also broke my heart.

I have tried to ignore all the Lexana rumblings, but I think the episode of Scare is going to cause me irreversible insanily.

What in the hell are TPTB doing to our favorite couple? He is Lex fucking Luthor! He wants to rule the world before he's 30, but only after Lana rejects his love? Are you kidding me?!

Please let this be some weirdass allegory.

But, back to your fic. Very funny, brillinat and inspired. WELL DONE :biggrin:

Blaire023
20th October 2004, 18:50
lmao, very good.

loved the whole reasoning behind the putting chloe and lex together. Although mine was more...

Lana has Jason, Clark has his monthly visits from Lois, but Chloe and Lex are all alonely. They have to band together in their time of isolation from their friends. Let them mate! MWAHAHAHAHA EVIL OFFSPRING!

course that's my logic anyway.

kinky
20th October 2004, 23:16
Originally posted by carebear72884@Oct 19 2004, 08:13 PM
:pclol: :pclol: :pclol: :pclol: :pclol:
LOL this is way way to funny...you really should send it to AlMiles, I don't care if they are offended...they need to see how we feel.
I agree with you. They really need to know how we feel about it.

Anyway, i really like this story. :biggrin:

sydsvaughn
21st October 2004, 03:36
I am so delighted (and saddened at how close to the truth it probably is) with this! It totally made my night--and I'm seriously wondering if we shouldn't just get a sight together to honor certain true 'heroes' of SV:

Stompy the Horse
The costume/drama room's old mirror
This lovely fic that really needs to be sent to AlMiles

SaraC

S.Ann Smith
21st October 2004, 20:42
:biggrin: excellent....!!

Susie Q
22nd October 2004, 09:40
http://www.angelfire.com/emo2/emoticons0/images/72.gif Hee. Good one!

Sunny
22nd October 2004, 16:31
Poor Steven DeKnight... Too bad for him they cancelled Angel & Buffy....

ColumbiaBlue
23rd October 2004, 10:23
Aw, man, this was hilarious! And the scary part... I could SEE this actually taking place. Oh man...

Poor Steven DeKnight... Too bad for him they cancelled Angel & Buffy....
Right? The por guy's probably sitting there going... "what the FUCK have I gotten myself into here... And who the hell is Kristin Kreuk?![/QUOTE] I thought that by bringing former Buffy writers to the show, it would actually improve... But all that has seemd to happen is that the already existing Smallvile writers, use former Buffy writers ideas but add Lana into it... Sad, sad...

Anyhoo, I want more.

~Manda

:blinkkiss:

katspell
29th October 2004, 21:14
*giggles* oh the horror.... and the humor.... that is good....

My husband is mad becuase he keeps recording the Smallville epis for me and I keep not watching them. I did watch the one with the Flash all the way trough... The problem is I did start watching them and the shower sceens keep grossing me out. I do NOT need to see KKs butt.

Lady Aquitaine
2nd November 2004, 21:46
Too funny... :pclol:
I can totally AlMiles doing that...

Excellent job!

welshy
14th May 2005, 16:13
That was excellent :rofl:

jaxie926
23rd May 2005, 03:20
rotflmao that's hilarious and OOOHHH so true!!!

arkakitty
16th July 2005, 10:03
I was laughing really hard. It was great.
I loved it :)

sinecure
23rd June 2006, 11:26
Oh, the sad, sad truth that is the process behind Smallville.

Hee! Very funny. And oh so true about Chlex.

somethingeasy
23rd June 2006, 11:38
this was so funny. One sole voice of reason amongst a crowd of Lana-fanatics. Just like a Chlex fan entering a we-luv-Lana chatroom, only so much funnier and more tragic at the same time :P

Alizaleven
23rd June 2006, 11:43
hehehehehe this was really funny! Gah! and yes it is more like lanaville which is gross ewwness.. but yeah this was really funny and good :D

~*~Tasha~*~
6th July 2006, 04:02
ROFL!! Too funny with the whole Al and Miles thing. It makes you wonder a little bit just how they do come up with these plots. Continuity is an issue at times, and they do seem to be a bit self-centered around Lana.

sylvia
6th July 2006, 06:20
Just re-read this; it's still as funny as it was the first time. You should do one for every episode that sucks! ... except that that would probably mean having to do one every week. ;)

LEXNCHLOEROCK
9th July 2006, 18:41
LOL that was funny despite how really to life it is! This part really cracked me up...


Al Gough: “Chloe?”

Miles Miller: (whispers to Al) “I think he means the blonde one.”

Al Gough: (nods in comprehension) “Oh her. I don’t get it why would he want her when there’s Lana?”


Good job!

~FuriousAngel!~
10th August 2006, 23:56
LMAO!!! that was so funny is like watching a scene out of legally blonde/ clueless but with Smallville producers i mean they are making me wonder what is going on with them!? "Lana factor" that was hilarious

P.S. Maybe Zod will appreciate Chloe... :P just wishful thinking hehe